Stupid, Stupid Parents

Parents angry over Obama speech

Some are outraged by the president's planned address to the nation's students next week

Are you fucking serious? Outraged? Really? How can you be outraged over something that hasn't even happened yet? "I don't know what the president is going to say, but I already know that it will fill me with OUTRAGE!" You want to know what the president is planning on saying?

"I'm going to be making a big speech to young people all across the country about the importance of education; about the importance of staying in school; how we want to improve our education system and why it’s so important for the country. So I hope everybody tunes in."

So, outrage? Really?

"The idea that school children across our nation will be forced to watch the President justify his plans for government-run health care, banks, and automobile companies, increasing taxes on those who create jobs, and racking up more debt than any other President, is not only infuriating, but goes against beliefs of the majority of Americans, while bypassing American parents through an invasive abuse of power," [Florida Republican Party] Chairman Jim Greer said in a press release.

Ok, if that were remotely true, you might have a beef here, but where in the hell would you get the idea that the President is going to justify plans that exist mainly in your imagination to schoolchildren? I mean, do you really think the President is going to waste his time explaining economic policy to children who haven't developed the intellectual capacity to understand them or the maturity to sit and listen to them? That's what next week's joint session of Congress is for. Oh, snap! No he didn't! Hell, yeah I did. Take note, aspiring bloggers, that's how it's done!

Why I Love Ben And Jerry

How Cool is This?























And also Ice cream. Sweet, delicious Ice Cream. MMMMMMMMM, Ice Cream! Drool. . . .

Hey, Look!

It's Bram Stoker's Dracula Performed by Baboons!

Does any other blog give you baboon horror movie re-enactments?

No. The answer is no.

All right, then.

You're welcome, America.

You Know What? Fuck You, Bob Dole!

This is what greeted me this morning when I opened the Op-Ed section of the Atlanta Journal-Constitution:

Bob Dole: Start anew

on health care reform

By Bob Dole

You know what, Bob? No.

First of all, why should we take any advice on healthcare from someone who not only opposed the creation of Medicare, but was still bragging about it in the 1990's?

And secondly, No.

No do-overs, no takie-backies, no starting anew. No. You guys had your chance. President Obama and the Democrats were dead set on making this a bi-partisan project. You guys had plenty of opportunity to put in your two cents, and God knows the Dem's were more accommodating than you had any right to expect. You could have participated in good faith, but you chose to shit all over the process, then asked for a delay so you could gin up phony controversies and disrupt town hall meetings so that the facts were shrouded in a haze of death panels and euthanasia and Nazis, and now you want to say that it's too confusing and we need to start over?

Health care reform is the No. 1 domestic priority. With all the charges and countercharges, those who will be affected, the American people, are understandably confused. Many are angry.

Whose fault is that? No one was confused until you (and I don't mean you personally, I mean the right in general) started making shit up. People are confused and angry because a bunch of fucking liars started yelling about tyranny and killing Baby Palin and Hitler and on and on. And it's only a small number of people who are confused and scared, they just happen to be the loudest. Polls still show that around 70% of Americans want a public option.

So no, Bob! We don't need to start over, you guys just need to get out of the way and let the grownups handle this. You had your chance.

Kind of Amazing

This is kind of amazing:

Duggars expecting their 19th child

In a surprise, TV's biggest reality family reveals that another sibling is on the way

It's not just that it's amazing that these loonies would want yet another kid, crazy people always want crazy things. And it's not even the fact that people actually watch their show, freak shows have always attracted an audience.

No, what really amazes me is that after 18 kids, Mrs. Duggar's lady parts can still provide enough friction to, um cause Mr. Duggar to complete the baby-making procedure. I mean, at this point, wouldn't it be like making sweet sweet love to the Holland Tunnel? You know, if the Holland Tunnel were made out of scar tissue and self-loathing?