Monday, October 15, 2012

The cure for all your ills


Author S.I. McMillen has the solution to all your health problems. Stop being such dirty little sex pigs!


McMillen published a ridiculous book called None of These Diseases back in 1963, which would be not at all interesting except for the fact that it's still being touted by nuts like David Barton.

So, what is the health risk of being the filthy little libertines you are? Oh, only toxic goiters, arthritis, and insanity!


The community does not know, but the physician knows, that breaking through God's fences around sex is the basic cause of Kathy's toxic goiter, or Helen's arthritis, or Suzanne's commitment to the insane asylum.
Yes, that is exactly what the physician knows. The physician knows that all illnesses are the result of reckless sluttiness.

S.I. McMillen apparently truly believes that the Bible holds the cure for all of mankind's illnesses from the common cold to cancer.

Who would expect Moses to make breakthroughs in epidemic prevention? Yet Moses recorded an unlikely promise to the ancient Hebrews:
If you give careful attention to the voice of the Lord your God, do what is right in his sight, give ear to his commandments, and keep all his statutes, I will put none of these diseases upon you, which I have brought upon the Egyptians, for I am the Lord who heals you.

Which is why no one in ancient Israel ever got sick. In fact many of them are still with us today. I live down the street from the prophet Ezekiel!

But what about all those who did die?

Thousands have dies through the centuries, however, because doctors ignored the biblical rules. Finally, when doctors read and tried these guidelines, they quickly discovered how to prevent the spread of epidemics. . . Even today we are benefiting from God's 3,500 year old instructions. 

One of those instructions was to separate lepers from the rest of the community to keep the disease from spreading, which, yes, does have the desired effect. But one would think that God would have give Moses an  actual cure, rather than just telling him to send the lepers out of the city to die alone. Also, the promise was supposed to be that people would not get diseases in the first place, not that diseases could be prevented from spreading, but perhaps I quibble.

What about mental health?

The individual who has Christ in his heart and the Bible in his hand has splendid fortifications against man's greatest mental disturbance - schizophrenia. Why do I make that statement? It is medically recognized that schizophrenia is the result of anxiety stemming from an inability to meet the adjustments of adulthood. 

Really? Is that medically recognized? Is it?
No. No, of course it isn't. According to the National Institute of Mental Health:

 Genes and environment. Scientists have long known that schizophrenia runs in families. The illness occurs in 1 percent of the general population, but it occurs in 10 percent of people who have a first-degree relative with the disorder. . .  recent research has found that people with schizophrenia tend to have higher rates of rare genetic mutations. These genetic differences involve hundreds of different genes and probably disrupt brain development. Other recent studies suggest that schizophrenia may result in part when a certain gene that is key to making important brain chemicals malfunctions. 

 Studies of brain tissue after death also have revealed differences in the brains of people with schizophrenia. Scientists found small changes in the distribution or characteristics of brain cells that likely occurred before birth. Some experts think problems during brain development before birth may lead to faulty connections.

So, no. Not anxiety.

It is medically recognized that schizophrenia is the result of anxiety stemming from an inability to meet the adjustments of adulthood. In highly predisposed individuals even a little anxiety can tip the scales. Furthermore, it is felt that any individual, if subjected to sufficient stress, could experience the schizophrenic reaction.

No. just no.

 Some authorities state that less than half of married women have ever experienced sexual orgasm. However, the emotions they derive from the sexual act are beautiful and completely gratifying without the need for any physical climax. Their emotions are diffused throughout their bodies. To them the glowing embers of hardwood are just as satisfying as the quick bright flash of a little gunpowder.

I believe the authority he cites in this paragraph is his wife, who produced the landmark study "It's okay, honey."


2 comments:

  1. Junk science makes the world go round! Not that the world itself is round, of course. It's flat. Perfectly flat. Everyone knows that. And isn't it in the Bible?

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm guessing poor Mrs. McMillen hasn't had much experience with hardwood, glowing or not. Notice how it's Kathy, Helen, and Suzanne that suffer the consequences of slutitude. Presumably Tom, Dick, and Harry are free to rub their tiny little man parts against sluts without suffering any ill symptoms. I'm guessing the alternate title for McMillen's book would be, "Orgasms are the Work of the Devil, Mrs. McMillen, Praise the Lord I've Never Given You One."

    ReplyDelete