Sunday, March 17, 2013

CPAC Crowd pretends Sarah Palin isn't a huge embarrassment









Sarah Palin was one of the stars of this year's CPAC, the only place in the world where she is considered relevant and Chris Christie is not. I don't know what the bulk of her speech was about, I'm going to go out on a limb and guess it was about the Real America? But I did see this clip, in which she acts like a snotty 12-year-old boy to wild applause from the troglodytes.


First she does what any 12-year-old whose dad lets him have a gun would do, makes sure everyone knows she has it. "Hey, did I ever mention that me and Tahd have guns, 'cuz we totally do. I totally bought him a gun for Christmas. He totally bought me a gun rack for all the guns I have, you guys. I'm kind of a gun expert!"

Then she makes a juvenile dick and boob joke "he has the 'gun', you guys! Get it? 'gun?' But I have the 'rack!' Ha ha, you get it? 'rack?' Hmm? You know, 'rack?' like boobs?" Ugh! painful.

Then she acts like she's some kind of defiant rebel by sipping from a Big Gulp. In Washington, DC. Where there are ZERO restrictions on sizes of soda, so wow! You're really flaunting your bad-girl street cred, there. For the record, I agree that mayor Bloomberg's soda rule is a stupid rule. And it has already been tossed out by the courts. But you're not in New York. You're not exactly stickin' it to the man, there. It would be like me flying to Las Vegas and playing a slot machine and bragging about how I'm a total bad-ass because gambling is illegal in Georgia. Then I fly back to Atlanta and brag to everyone about how I broke the law and totally got away with it because I'm a rebel and I'll never be any good. I'm a rebel and I never ever do what I should!

But of course the mouth breathers in the CPAC audience erupt into wild ovations like she was Spartacus, brazenly defying the Imperial might of Caesar! Oh, my God, what a hero!



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1 comment:

  1. On a lighter note, there's a Stop and Park in Maryland with a thousand cars stuck paying long term fees because the idiot in the lead car can't figure how to make the black and white two-by-four go up and down.

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