Sunday, January 8, 2012

A new civil rights hero!

Colorado high school senior Sydney Spies and her mother are fighting for her rights. Apparently her high school administration is being totally repressive and totally like, violating her rights and stuff.

http://www.theblaze.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/Sydney-Spies-protest-620x429.jpg 
There's a bus. Just like Rosa Parks!
Yes she and her mother are out there fighting for freedom of the press and freedom of expression and really, just freedom in general.

So, what was the initial provocation, the violation of this young woman's rights which prodded her into taking a stand and saying "no more?"
A Colorado teenager whose yearbook picture was rejected for being too revealing is vowing to fight the ban with her high school’s administration

Yes. The administration decided it would not put this picture in the school yearbook:




Colorado Student Banned from Yearbook Over Racy Photo (ABC News)


Just because it looks like the cover of High School Lolitas IV.
“I feel like they aren’t allowing me to have my freedom of expression,” Spies told the Herald.  ”I think the administration is wrong in this situation, and I don’t want this to happen to other people.”

Other people. She selflessly thinks of other people at a time like this! Because if it can happen to her, what's to stop them from doing it to you? First they came for the hot chick, and I said nothing for I was neither hot nor a chick. . .

http://cdn.sheknows.com/articles/2011/04/weird-prom-dresses_copy.jpg 
Next thing you know, You won't be able to wear this dress to the prom!

Fortunately, she is not alone in this fight.

Spies was joined by her mother, Miki Spies, and a handful of fellow Durango High students and alumni in a protest outside the school Wednesday after, she said, administrators informed her the photo would not be permitted because it violated dress code.

Seriously? That's the mother's reaction? Not "put a shirt on, dear." or "let me explain why that sort of picture is inappropriate." No, her mother's reaction is to take time away from whatever she normally does all day to come down to the school to demand her daughter's right to portray herself as eye-candy. Watch out, Dina Lohan, there's a new candidate for mother of the century!

http://www.damnimcute.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/dina_lohan_ali_lindsay.jpg 
Look at me! I'm famous! I mean my daughter's famous! I mean LOOK AT ME!

Prior to today’s meeting, the Spies family told local media they planned to meet with a civil lawyer in Denver to review their daughter’s case.

A lawyer. They're going meet with a layer over this issue. 
This generation has no future.

Thursday, January 5, 2012

Good Job, Iowa!

This is the guy whose campaign you just resurrected.


http://queerty-prodweb.s3.amazonaws.com/wp/docs/2011/07/santorum_ice_cream_2.jpg

Way to go. You just catapulted this vile, loathsome worm back into the national spotlight in all of his sex-obsessed glory.

Now, there's nothing necessarily wrong with being sex-obsessed. If you are say, Wilt Chamberlain or Ron Jeremy, or every teen-aged boy ever. But combine sex-obsession with a healthy dose of self-loathing and a double helping of Catholic Guilt, and you get shit like this:



“One of the things I will talk about, that no president has talked about before, is I think the dangers of contraception in this country,”

People using contraception face the danger of not being impregnated or not exposed to HIV. Are you brave enough to take that risk?

“It’s not okay. It’s a license to do things in a sexual realm that is counter to how things are supposed to be.”

ie, having sex without being punished for it?


It’s supposed to be for purposes that are yes, conjugal but also immunative but also procreative. That’s the perfect way that a sexual union should happen.

Yeah, I didn't know what the word "immunative" means either. In my defense, neither did Dictionary dot Com.  I did find a definition of sorts on Trade.Mar.Cx:


IMMUNATIVE
BIONATIVE AB
Pharmaceutical preparations in tablet and liquid form of the treatment of infectious diseases, namely bacteriae and fungus diseases; dietary preparations for use as nutritional food supplements; anti-fungal and antibacterial preparations in tablet and liquid form; antibacterial and anti-fungal wound dressings; antiseptics; medical plasters; medicated mouthwashes; veterinary preparations for warm blooded mammals; in tablet and liquid form for treatment of pulmonary and dermatological diseases

So apparently, sex with Rick is a lot like that. Medicated mouthwashes, warm-blooded mammals, and dermatological diseases. Sounds pretty hot!

That’s the perfect way that a sexual union should happen. When we take any part of that out, we diminish the act. If you can take one part out, when it's not for purposes of procreation, that's not one of the reasons, then you diminish this very special bond between men and women.

Because you can't really have a special bond with a non-pregnant woman! Am I right, fellas? This guy knows what I'm talking about!

http://cdn.imnotobsessed.com/wp-content/uploads/duggar-topper.jpg 
Look how close they are!

So why can't you take other parts of it out? And all of a sudden it becomes deconstructed to the point where it's simply pleasure. And that's certainly a part of it, and it's an important part of it, don't get me wrong. But there are a lot of things we do for pleasure. 

https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOILF3mWNI4gpFGar7rRWeqMqYOQfBAg-lrRUuqWmE1ecaPAvnnwA6a3CrWZkNasAbnS8LIPPcEpd7S1xJUpKXvMfuQ4Dtag4k2AcOUK8rk9ycYi9RH0T4sj2wkI8kkl5IklUPLN2PR5Y/s400/funny-hilarious-ugly-people32.jpg
For example.

And   this is special and it needs to be seen as special. And, again, I know most presidents don't talk about those things. And maybe people don't want us to talk about those things. 

Also, otters do not want you to talk about such things.
 La la la la la I Can't hear you making sex sound totally creepy!

I'm not running for preacher, I'm not running for pastor.  But these are important public policy issues.

Yes, important public policy issues. What folks do in private is important public policy. That's the guy you voted for, Iowa! Nice going. Do you know how close we were to never having to hear from this despicable little ratfuck ever again? His numbers were in single digits, he was looking up at Bachmann. BACHMANN! And once he was out of this race, that was it for him. It's not like he has the charisma to start picking up a paycheck from FOX. He was gone. Until you geniuses let him finish a close second. Way to go, Iowa!

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Jonesuary Duets

Tom Jones with Aretha Franklin




With Van the Man and Jeff Beck



With Tina Turner




With Janis Joplin



With Jerry Lee Lewis



With little Richard


Tuesday, January 3, 2012

If Newt Gingrich were half as smart as he thinks he is, he'd be twice as smart as he is.

Why does Gingrich feel the need to constantly try to make people think he's smarter than everyone else?

First he said that he understood the Constitution better than lawyers because he's an HISTORIAN! Oooooh!

Now, there's this:

"I'm an amateur paleontologist, so I've spent a lot of time looking at the earth's temperature over a very long time," Gingrich said. "I'm a lot harder to convince than just by looking at a computer model." 

 http://cdn.moxiebird.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/really-seth-and-amy.gif

Really? You like dinosaurs so you're an expert on, um, something?

Really? You're an amateur scientist so we should trust you over professional scientists?

And, really? You're interest in paleontology qualifies you to comment on climatology? Really? You think your fake expertise in one field of science carries over into other branches? Like "science" is some all-inclusive field of study? Really?



http://www.digitalbusstop.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/The-Professor.jpg 

I'm an expert in SCIENCE!

Jonesuary 3, 2012

Happy Jonesuary