Here we go again. . .

You have got to be fuckin' kidding me!

Boehner: I'm ready to 'reappoint' members to special Benghazi panel in new Congress

Ughhhhhhh. . . how is there still a Benghazi committee? It's like still having the Warren Commission.
It's done.  All your phony "questions" have been answered. Do you seriously have this little dignity?

“On September 11, 2012, four Americans were killed in a brutal terrorist attack in Libya. Two years later, the American people still have far too many questions about what happened that night — and why,” Boehner said in the statement.

No the "American people" do not have "far too many questions." Only the chucklefucks that believe the bullshit folks like you spew on FOX news have questions. For sane people, all the questions have been answered. At this point, you're pandering to the Alex Jones demographic.

And Boehner knows better. He's not this stupid. He's not Steve King or Louie Gohmert or Michele Bachmann. He knows this is bullshit and he's doing it anyway. Because he feels like he has to kiss the teabagging asses of the kind of people who think King, Gohmert, and Bachmann deserve positions of responsibility. The kind of people who spend half the day with their thumbs up their asses and the other half wondering why their thumbs taste funny.

“That’s why I will reappoint Rep. Trey Gowdy and the Republican members of the House Select Committee to investigate the events in Benghazi in the 114th Congress. I look forward to the definitive report Chairman Gowdy and the Select Committee will present to the American people.” 

You look forward to a definitive report. There has already been a . . . how can you look forward to something that has already happened?




Hey, when you're done, maybe you could look into the Lindbergh baby case. Maybe appoint a special committee to check out who's making them crop circles?Was it aliens?

 

God damn you, History Channel!

Bad Ads - Guinness

First of all, this is just so maudlin and dreary. My grandma would have called it "schmaltzy."  And using the strong emotional reactions that people have about the troops to sell your product is unseemly at best. It's just really tacky.

But the really odd thing is the choice of music. The song that they play under the ad is "Leaning on the Everlasting Arms" which most people know either as a church hymn or as the song Robert Mitchum sings in Night of the Hunter. So it's either kind of sacrilegious or creepy.




Night of the Hunter, by the way, is an underrated movie. You should give it a viewing if its on Netflix or Hulu or whatever. Kind of a sad story about this movie, it was the first feature directed by actor Charles Laughton. The reviews were so cruel that he never directed another. Which is a shame because the problems with this movie were in the script, not the direction. He actually does some pretty cool camera stuff with light and shadows and whatnot. Check out Roger Ebert's glowing review : http://www.rogerebert.com/reviews/great-movie-the-night-of-the-hunter-1955

Witch Hunt Fails to Find any Witches

So the final ultimate super-duper select committee on the BenghaziBenghaziBengahziImpeachTCOT!!! scandal has filed its final report and even the super sleuths of the Issa Mystery Machine committee found that there was zero wrongdoing on the part of the administration. Zero intelligence failures. Zero delays in response. Zero lies told to the American people.

So it's finally over. We can finally put this nonsense to bed and get on to dealing with actual problems that actually exist. And we'll never have to hear another word. . .

Hahahaha! You wish!

Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.) on Sunday blasted a House GOP-led investigation that recently debunked myths about the 2012 Benghazi attack. 
“I think the report is full of crap,” Graham said on CNN’s “State of the Union.”

Sighhhhhh. . .  of course.

Keep fucking that chicken, Lindsey!

Saturd80's - Fun Boy Three

Douche quote of the day

When asked if he felt embarrassed about his new contract paying him more per day than mosr Americans make per year, Giancarlo Stanton said this:


.

Dude.

You play a game for a living.

What you do is not really "work."  it is certainly not a "huge responsibility."

This is what a job with "huge responsibility" looks like:

 

This is what your job looks like:

Huge responsibility:



Your job:

 Spot the difference?

Of course, Stanton's answer may be less douchey than the headline under which it appeared:

Giancarlo Stanton Nailed It When Asked About Making More In 1 Day Than Most Americans Make In A Year

  By Cork Gaines

 Like that was the best possible answer he could have given. There is just no imaginable scenario in which a ballplayer comes up with a better justification for his obscene salary than "um, I do work!" Bullseye, motherfucker!

So why does Business Insider's Cork Gaines (wait. . .Cork? really?) think this was such a spot-on perfect answer?

What Stanton did not point out is that a lot of work went into getting to where he is. While many Americans work hard, Stanton happens to do it in an industry with a lot of money and he does it as well as anybody else in the world.

Ohhhh, right. . . lots of "hard work."

Yeah, it totally makes sense that someone who works hard and excels at a sports game should be paid as much ad, oh, say 500 people who work hard and excel at, say, putting their lives on the line in service to their country? Or educating the next generation? Or building our nation's infrastructure?

So, at Stanton's press conference to announce the contract signing, one reporter asked the slugger if he was embarrassed to make more in one day ($69,000 on average throughout the contract) than most Americans make in an entire year.

Showing why he is this country's next superstar that is more than just a great ballplayer, Stanton kept his poise, smiled, and delivered the perfect answer, noting that this contract "isn't like a lottery ticket."

Wow, I mean if you could keep your poise under those circumstances. . . being asked about the millions and m,illions of dollars you're going to be paid, I mean most of us would probably collapse weeping or throw a chair Bobby Knight style if someone asked us about our newly acquired vast fortune. But he actually managed to smile and say words? 

Superstar!