Carrie Prejean is a Traditional Girl.

Dammit, I wish Carrie Prejean would quit making me aware of her existence!



She's in the news again:

RadarOnline.com has learned exclusively that Prejean, famous for her conservative Christian views and opposition to same-sex marriage, is living with Boller in his Del Mar, Calif. home.ome

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A source close to the couple confirmed to RadarOnline.com that Carrie has indeed moved in. “She’s living there. He’s remodeling the house and she’s helping him.”

Yes, Ms Prejean has taken the principled stand that only heterosexual, one man / one woman couples should be allowed to shack up and, to use the Old Testament phrase, fornicate.
You know, like God intended. What could be a better defense of "traditional" marriage than an as-yet-unmarried couple co-habitating?

"hey, at least I'm not some horrible lesbian," said Ms. Prejean. "Old Testament laws don't apply to today's modern world, except the stuff about homos! God really hates that homo stuff!"

(quote fabricated, obviously)


Also, only decent, God-fearing hetero women are allowed to expose their nipples in public.



And I really have to agree with her on this point. If I see one more heathen, atheist, lesbian nipple on a public beach, well. . . wait what were we talking about? Boobies? I think?
heeheeeheee, "boobies!" That's a naughty word!

Carrie Prejean Update

Is Carrie Prejean's body still the Temple of The Lord?

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I would say the jury's still out on that one.

But if so, God's gonna have to fire His architect

(fair warning. Clicking on the above pictures leads to NSFW versions)

(credit where credit is due: I stole these pictures from The Superficial)

Miss California, Again

Good God, am I sick of this woman!

I saw her making her little speech about her grandfather at the Battle of the Bulge, and how he fought for her right to say stupid stuff at a bimbo contest, and she gets all choked up, and I thought I was gonna puke!

Then she says, and I'm going to paraphrase here, because i don't want to have to watch it again to get the exact quotation, but she says something like, I exercised my freedom of speech and I was punished for it!" And I'm thinking, how were you punished? You weren't stripped of your crown, even when it came to light that you had violated pageant rules, nothing bad happened to you, what do you mean punished?
Then I realized, Oh, she thinks that her anti-gay-marriage speech is what cost her the Miss USA title. She thinks that the title is rightly hers, but it was taken away due to her political beliefs. She thinks that the contest is not just based on who's the prettiest and who boinked the most judges. She really believes that she is the victim of a witch hunt by the miss USA audience, whom she says is "95% gay, or whatever."

Let's get everything we have to discuss about Miss CA out of the way here, so we never have to mention her again. First of all, how many of these pictures are going to keep popping up?


She's blaming the new ones on the wind, which apparently blew her shirt off, and blaming the photographer for taking the pictures. . . for which she was. . . posing, or something. . .






Look at the photo on the right. How is she going to say that the photographer shot that "in between poses" (which she is claiming) That's not a pose? For God's sake, at least be honest! Maybe the one on the left, where she looks to be fixing her hair, maybe you could claim that that one was taken without your knowledge, but the one on the right? Oh, Puh-leez! That's a pose if ever I've seen one.

Prejean said the latest round of photos showing her bare chest were outtakes from a photo shoot taken two years ago for a California surfing magazine.

“I actually was standing on a cliff and it very, very windy, and it was the photographer and I, and he had to have gotten some sort of shot of me where I was exposed,” she said. “However they should not have been published.”

Yeah, how could the photographer have gotten a shot of you where you were exposed, standing there all shirtless and all. Boy, that's a mystery! Oh, and those photos were for a magazine, so, yeah, they should never have been published!

The she said this:

"Honestly, I felt as though Satan was -- and I don't want to say that this person represented Satan, but -- I felt as though Satan was trying to tempt me in asking me this question. And then God was in my head and in my heart saying, 'Carrie, do not compromise this. You need to stand up for me.

Riiiiight, God Almighty needs bikini girl to stand up for Him. The Lord of Heaven and Earth needs help from an aspiring lingerie model. Ok, then! No delusions of grandeur there!

One last thing.

Why is this:

Considered shocking and distasteful,






But This is perfectly acceptable?

Miss California, Revisited.

So now a new photo has surfaced of Miss CA, Carrie Prejean, from some lingerie ad she did at some point in her life. What most people are taking away from this is that this makes her somewhat hypocritical in terms of being a spokesmodel for "family values" or whatever. But here's the thing that jumps out at me when I see this picture:

prior to the cosmetic surgery, Ms Prejean was pretty. What the hell would make a young lady who looks like the above picture think that plastic surgery was a good idea? What the hell is wrong with the model/beauty pageant subculture that the girl in that picture feels like she needs to take drastic steps to "improve" her looks?


How could the young woman in the above photo look in the mirror and think hmm, maybe some second-rate hackery on the old face is in order. Now where can I find an unlicensed surgeon with the DT's who will work on short notice?

And who could possibly think that this:


is an improvement?

And look at the first picture again. Why would that gal need for pageant officials to pay for her to have breast implants? She has her own perfectly good bosoms. I shudder to think that she could have been so dissatisfied with her appearance that she had the real ones removed and replaced with the fakes.

What the hell did this poor girl's parents do to her?


And now, in the interest of attracting more traffic to this blog, I would like to reiterate that we have been discussing Miss California, her breasts, and topless photos.

Ok, I am really not proud of that last bit. I'm going to go sit in the corner and think about what I've done.

Miss California

At first, I felt kind of bad for her. It didn't really seem fair to ambush Miss USA contestants with political questions. I mean, it seems like a safe assumption that young women who consent to being paraded around and judged like livestock at a county fair probably don't have a lot of clear, well-thought-out opinions on the issues of the day.

And it seemed like she didn't necessarily have a problem with same-sex marriage, just felt like it wasn't her cup of tea, what with her enjoying winkies and all.

"I think it's great that Americans are able to choose one or the other. We live in a land where you can choose same-sex marriage or opposite marriage," she said at the pageant.

See, so that seems like something a reasonable person might say, although I would think that "opposite marriage" would probably be divorce, but i don't want to nitpick.

"And you know what? I think in my country, in my family, I think that I believe that a marriage should be between a man and a woman. No offense to anybody out there, but that's how I was raised."

So at this point, I'm thinking, Ok, everyone's entitled to their opinion, no big deal, I didn't really think that there was any reason to vilify the little airhead.

And I thought it really wasn't her fault that the right wing chose her as a sort of cause celebre.

Then I read this:

Miss California USA Carrie Prejean announced Thursday she will star in an anti-gay marriage ad sponsored by the controversial National Organization for Marriage.

Oh, it's on now, bitch!

Sorry, channeling Perez Hilton for a second there!

Oh, and this:

Prejean later said she thought she had lost the contest because of her stance.

Really? Because i was thinking maybe you lost because it's hard to win a beauty contest looking like this:

Neither Real, Nor Spectacular

"I was attacked for giving my own opinion on stage at a Miss USA contest, and I'm going to do whatever it takes, Matt, to protect marriage," Prejean, 21, told NBC "Today" show host Matt Lauer.

"The National Organization for Marriage basically just respects, um, you know, marriages and people who support it," she said. "That's what I'm here to do today, protect traditional marriage."

Really? Is that what they do? Just respect Marriage? Have you ever heard of Orson Scott Card? No? Well, most people haven't, he's evidently a fairly popular science fiction writer. There's no reason you should really be all that familiar with him, except that he sits on the board of the National Organization for Marriage. Why is that important? Because he says things like this:

Laws against homosexual behavior should remain on the books…to be used when necessary to send a clear message that those who flagrantly violate society's regulation of sexual behavior cannot be permitted to remain as acceptable, equal citizens.

And this:

How long before married people answer the dictators thus: Regardless of law, marriage has only one definition, and any government that attempts to change it is my mortal enemy. I will act to destroy that government and bring it down, so it can be replaced with a government that will respect and support marriage, and help me raise my children in a society where they will expect to marry in their turn.

Kinda scary, no? And also kinda ironic, since Mr. Card happens to be, wait for it, a Mormon!

Biological imperatives trump laws. American government cannot fight against marriage and hope to endure. If the Constitution is defined in such a way as to destroy the privileged position of marriage, it is that insane Constitution, not marriage, that will die.

Hey, Card! You're really going with the "biological imperative" thing? Cuz, if you're a male, your biological imperative is to mate with as many females as possible to ensure the continuation of your blood line and the survival of the species. You know, like a Mormon. One male - one female lifelong mating pairs are rarely seen in nature (wolves come to mind)
The only reason humans are able to make marriages work is that we are able to overcome our biological imperatives, so let's not pretend that there is some scientific basis to your hatred of the gay people.

But I digress.

Where were we? Oh yeah, Miss California. Hey Miss California, Shut the hell up. No one cares what a second-rate beauty queen/cosmetic surgery demo model has to say about anything of any importance, OK? Do us all a favor and stick to cutting ribbons at Orange County strip malls, and fending off Howard Stern.