Thursday, March 5, 2009

Rush Limbaugh




So Bloated, Bloviating Blowhard Rush Limbaugh wants President Obama to come on his show and debate him, which is a little like me challenging Kobe Bryant to a little one-on-one.*
I imagine the debate going something like this:

OBAMA: I believe, that in regard to the stimulus package. . .

RUSH: I hate women!

OBAMA: Yes, I know, but as I was saying. . .

RUSH: You're black!

OBAMA: Excuse me?

RUSH: I'm not going to bend over and grab my ankles for you, just because you're black!**

OBAMA: Good God, I should hope not! Now about the stimulus. . .

RUSH: LaLaLaLa, I can't hear you, LaLaLalLA Socialism, LaLaLaLaLaLa You're a socialist LaLa

OBAMA: Am I being punked?

RUSH: I win the debate! You owe me 1000 oxycontins!

I would rather see old Rush debate Susie Essman from "Curb Your Enthusiasm," because I think the debate might go more like this:

SUSIE: Rush, you fat fuck, shut your goddamned mouth!

RUSH: but, but but,

SUSIE: Fuck You, you drug-addicted cocksucker!

RUSH: But I. . .

SUSIE: Shut up, you lying sack of shit!

Then the ref stops the fight.

*Kobe, if you're reading this, I totally do challenge you to a game!

**Think I'm exgagerating? check this out. Or this.