Hail to the Chiefs – Malia and Sasha Obama
May 10, 2012 By Bristol Palin
Is anyone really surprised by the fact that President Obama came out of the closet for gay marriage?
Well, I am. I can't remember the last time he had the balls to take a potentially controversial stand on anything.
What was most surprising is when he explained how his position (supposedly) “evolved,” by talking to his wife and daughters:
"Supposedly" because obviously nothing has ever evolved. Duh!
“It’s interesting, some of this is also generational,” the president continued. “You know when I go to college campuses, sometimes I talk to college Republicans who think that I have terrible policies on the economy, on foreign policy, but are very clear that when it comes to same-sex equality or, you know, sexual orientation, that they believe in equality. They are much more comfortable with it. You know, Malia and Sasha, they have friends whose parents are same-sex couples. There have been times where Michelle and I have been sitting around the dinner table and we’re talking about their friends and their parents and Malia and Sasha, it wouldn’t dawn on them that somehow their friends’ parents would be treated differently. It doesn’t make sense to them and, frankly, that’s the kind of thing that prompts a change in perspective.”
Um-hum, and let's see how you can spin a nice family discussion about treating people decently into something horrible. . .
Let’s pause for just one second. When Christian women run for high office, people inevitably bring up the question of submission. Once, Michele Bachmann, for example, was asked during a debate, “As president, would you be submissive to your husband?”
Ms Bachmann was asked that question because she has expressed those kind of trogolodyte fundamentalist views before, not for whatever insidious fake reason you're going to assume.
People automatically assume that a Christian female President isn’t capable of making decisions without her spouse’s stamp of approval. (I should add female Republican candidates –liberal women don’t get the same kind of questions.)
Goddamm right we don't, bitch!
Maybe because people know that liberal women are unlikely to espouse such ridiculous beliefs?
So are all those reporters who feared excessive family intervention in the White House all up in arms over the President’s announcement yesterday? Um. Not quite.
Because it's totally the same thing, a president listening to his family's point of view and a president having to get her decisions approved by a self-loathing closet queen. Yeah, totally the same.
So let me get this straight – it’s a problem if my mom listened too much to my dad, but it’s a heroic act if the President made a massive change in a policy position that could affect the entire nation after consulting with his teenage daughters?
Jeezus! How did you work your mom into this? You do know Michele Bachmann is not your mom, right? I know other people get them mixed up, but you. . .
See, the stupid, empty-headed one is. . . no, that's not helpful.
Um, the batshit crazy one. . . oh, never mind.
And no one ever said that the problem with your mom was that she listened to your dad. She's got 99 problems, but your dad ain't one. No one ever accused your mother of listening to anyone except the voices in her head.
While it’s great to listen to your kids’ ideas, there’s also a time when dads simply need to be dads.
In this case, it would’ve been helpful for him to explain to Malia and Sasha that while her friends parents are no doubt lovely people, that’s not a reason to change thousands of years of thinking about marriage.
Yes, we must continue to think about things the way our anestors did thousands of years ago, That's why w must throw virgins into volcanoes to kep them from erupting, and consult the goat entrails before going into battle.
Or that – as great as her friends may be – we know that in general kids do better growing up in a mother/father home. Ideally, fathers help shape their kids’ worldview.
In this situation, it was the other way around. I guess we can be glad that Malia and Sasha aren’t younger, or perhaps today’s press conference might have been about appointing Dora the Explorer as Attorney General because of her success in stopping Swiper the Fox.
Yes, because the actual living, breathing, human parents of their friends are exactly the same as a cartoon character.
Sometimes dads should lead their family in the right ways of thinking. In this case, it would’ve been nice if the President would’ve been an actual leader and helped shape their thoughts instead of merely reflecting what many teenagers think after one too many episodes of Glee.
I'm sorry, how many episodes of Glee does it take to give someone the idea that gay people are, um, people? People who should have at least the same rights as an ignorant hillbilly hatemonger whose sole accomplishment was figuring out a way to make money off of getting knocked up by a human meth PSA?
Not Even Once.