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Monday, July 29, 2013

So predictable



Several years ago, when we still lived in Northern California, we took a drive up to Oregon to visit the Missus's parents. In the area just above and below the CA/OR border, we saw several signs welcoming us to the State of Jefferson, the 51st State.

 
The most interesting state in the world
 

 From what we could gather at the time, the concept of Jefferson was that people in the far north of California and southern Oregon didn't feel like they were adequately represented in their respective state capitols and so wanted to break off into a new state of their own. Apparently, this idea goes back a long way. According to the Jefferson Public radio website:

The first recorded "rebellion" of Jeffersonians was quite serious and occurred in 1852. At the first California state legislature a bill was introduced to create a "State of Shasta" which encompassed much of what is now Jefferson. The bill died in committee but only because of the pressure of other legislative business.

Anyway. . . the only real reason I even bring this up is because of a flyer that Jeffersonians circulated in the 1940's which has maybe the funniest line ever written in a secessionist manifesto:
You are now entering Jefferson, the 49th State of the Union.
Jefferson is now in patriotic rebellion against the states of California and Oregon.
This State has seceded from California and Oregon this Thursday, November 27, 1941. Patriotic Jeffersonians intend to secede each Thursday until further notice.
 
(emphasis added by me because that is freakin hysterical!)
 
Now the people of Jefferson had some legitimate beefs back in the day. They paid their taxes same as anyone else, but they were kinda getting stiffed on government services, especially roads. And they had some fairly clever slogans along those lines like:
 
"OUR ROADS ARE NOT PASSABLE, HARDLY JACKASSABLE" "THE PROMISED LAND -- OUR ROADS ARE PAVED WITH PROMISES."  "IF OUR ROADS YOU WOULD TRAVEL, BRING YOUR OWN GRAVEL."

Sure, they weren't misspelt racist, or paranoid, but still, pretty clever.
 
Wouldn't have lasted 10 minutes in Jefferson
 

But, even thought their beef was legitimate, they never did end up seceding, the end.

Now, North Colorado, on the other hand. . .

Proposed new state in northern Colorado gains traction



A proposal backed by several Colorado counties to form a new state called North Colorado is getting public support.
More than four dozen people showed up Thursday at the first public meeting to discuss a proposal to form a 51st state. Nearly all of them said they support secession.

Four dozen people! Wow! That's almost as many people as the number of donuts eaten at the last meeting I attended! What a formidable group four dozen people is! Do you k=have any idea what 4 dozen people look like all gathered in one place?

 
In fairness, this is actually 55 people.
 

I mean, if this many people are in support, it's bound to pass!

But it's so sadly predictable. Every time right-wingers don't get their way, they want to take their bat and ball and go home. They had 8 years of GW Bush, six of those with Republican Congresses, and the minute the other guy takes office, you got your Rick Perrys and your Todd Palins wanting to secede from the damn Union. They don't like Obamacare, they want to shut down the entire government. Because majority rule is apparently only a guiding principle when they are in the majority.

So what long train of abuses and usurpations is causing 4 dozen people to dissolve the political bonds which have connected them with another?

I think people, when they feel disenfranchised, when they feel that their voices are not being heard, I think that’s a problem in a representative form of government,” Weld County commissioner Sean Conway was quoted as saying.

Oh, that does sound pretty bad. I can't imagine what that must feel like, as someone who opposed the war in Iraq and the bank bailout and wanted single-payer healthcare, I imagine it must be awful to not have your voice heard!
Anything more specific?

The five Weld County commissioners at the meeting said they support including the 51st state initiative on the county's ballot in November, The Greeley Tribune reported.
Commissioners say legislative efforts to crack down on energy drilling and gun laws are prime reasons for the movement.
“We believe there’s an attack on oil and gas,” commissioner Barbara Kirkmeyer said. “We believe there’s an attack on agriculture. I don’t think those down in Denver understand any of it.”

Oh, sure. Now it makes sense. You're going to secede from the state of Colorado because you feel so strongly that you must defend the rights of the oil and gas companies and gun manufacturers. Now I get it!



One other thing. For FOX, when thousands of protestors show up to occupy Wall Street, that's just an insignificant little group of hippies, but when an entire FOUR DOZEN show up to fake-secede from Colorado, that's an idea that is "Gaining Traction!"