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Thursday, October 28, 2010

New Rules

On the way home from work the other day, I heard on the news that one of the prisoners at Guantanamo had been convicted of terrorism. Then the news guy said that the crime this person committed was throwing a grenade at an American soldier. I thought I must have heard wrong, because throwing a grenade at an enemy soldier really seems like exactly what you're supposed to do during a war and not terrorism at all.
But no, that's apparently what happened.

WASHINGTON — A former child soldier being held at the military prison at Guantánamo Bay, Cuba, pleaded guilty on Monday to terrorism-related charges, averting the awkward prospect that he would be the first person to stand trial before a military commission under the Obama administration. The defendant, Omar Khadr, 24, a Canadian, admitted to a military judge that he threw a grenade that killed an American soldier during a 2002 firefight (emphasis added)


So I guess the new rule is that if your country gets invaded by a foreign army, you are not allowed to fight back. At least if that army is American. If you're invaded by America, you'll take it and like it. Honestly, if I weren't so emotionally stunted, this story would make me weep.

The centerpiece of the charges was not a conventional terrorism offense — targeting civilians — but killing an enemy soldier in combat. Usually in war, battlefield killing is not prosecuted. But the United States contended that Mr. Khadr lacked battlefield immunity because he wore no uniform, among other requirements of the laws of war.


New Rule #2:
If you are a Democrat in Virginia, it is apparently illegal for you to be in the same room with Eric Cantor:



A Louisa County man was arrested at a rally for Rep. Eric Cantor, R-7th, at Louisa Courthouse yesterday and charged with trespassing, resisting arrest and creating a public disturbance.
Jon Taylor, a Democrat, said today that he feels he was "manhandled" by Louisa authorities.Taylor said Cantor had promoted the event on his website, so he assumed it was a public event. "We RSVP'd," he said.
He and three other Democrats went inside the coffeehouse with the intent of asking questions ofCantor who has declined to debate Waugh.
Taylor said the Democrats were asked to leave by the coffee shop's owner. When they refused, authorities escorted them outside.






A spokesman for Cantor said: "The voters of Virginia are going to reject this thuggery." which sounds sensible until you read the full quote.

  Ray Allen, Jr, a spokesman for Cantor, said "this was a clear attempt to disrupt the meeting. The voters of Virginia are going to reject this thuggery."

So going to a meeting intending to ask questions of your Congressman is now considered "thuggery." 

New Rule # 3:

If you live in Connecticut, and you want to vote for Linda McMahon for whatever reason, you are now allowed to go to the polls dressed like your favorite rassler.


WWE garb allowed at polls, Connecticut judge rules 

WWE CEO Vince McMahon sued to make sure supporters of his wife Linda McMahon wouldn't run afoul of electioneering rules if they wore WWE merchandise to the polls.

On Wednesday US District Judge Janet Bond Arterton ruled that Nutmeg State election officials must allow voters to wear World Wrestling Entertainment-themed clothing to the polls.Such garb cannot be considered political advertising for former WWE CEO and current Connecticut GOP Senate candidate Linda McMahon, said Judge Arterton

 Because sure, why should the most basic building block of democracy be treated with any respect? Why shouldn't voters maintain the same level of dignity when voting as they do when attending Comic-con?

 

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Don't leave me hangin' Bro!