Can Someone Please Explain To Me

Why in the hell this

is still going on in this day and age?
Surely there isn't anyone out there who actually believes that the weather is dependent upon whether or not a particular rodent sees its own shadow. And does anyone really think that you can even tell whether he has seen it or not? How does the rodent tell you, how does he communicate this information to you? By returning to his hole? I know if I got up, went out my front door and saw Creepy McMoustache and a bunch of slow-witted ninnies popping flashbulbs in my face, I'd turn around and go back to bed too. But I wouldn't expect anyone to see my actions as a foreboding omen of weather to come.

And it's bad enough that the top-hatted nincompoop battalion

goes through this absurd charade year after year, but media outfits like Reuters, the AP, and even National Geographic cover the nincompoopery as if it were a legitimate news story. Seriously! Look:

Ker Than

for National Geographic News

Updated February 2, 2010

Don't pack away those winter clothes just yet: This morning famed groundhog forecaster Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow. . .

Way to go, National Geographic!

msnbc.com news services

updated 12:45 p.m. ET, Tues., Feb. 2, 2010

PUNXSUTAWNEY, Pa. - The world's most famous groundhog, Punxsutawney Phil, emerged before chilly revelers in western Pennsylvania on Tuesday to see his shadow, a sign his handlers say means winter will last another six weeks.

What a story! MSNBC, your place for politics! And rodent shadow coverage!

I guess the media has plenty of time to cover retarded nonsense like this, because there's just not that much going on right now. We're only involved in two wars. That's not very many. That should occupy like what, one reporter per war? And maybe a reporter or two to look at the economy, there's not a whole lot to report on there. And there are hardly any allegations of torture coming out at the moment, and only two political parties combining to fuck up healthcare reform. So sure, ther should be plenty of reporters left to cover the fuzzy animal falderal.

Or maybe it's just that there's only one time per year that reporters get to use the phrase "Gobbler's Knob." Yeah, really.