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Monday, May 10, 2010

Alas, poor Professor Chaos! I knew him, Horatio (actually married 15 years) . A fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy. ....

....He hath borne me on his back a thousand times (well given me a few back rubs anyway). I am sorry to report that our dear friend, the Professor, is as deathly ill as I have seen him in the seventeen years that I have known him. He asked me to provide a guest post, but I suck at this. I AM worked up over the damn oil spill in the gulf, but am not clever or informed enough to entertain you people who deserve so much more than my rantings. So, send well wishes to our dedicated reporter; he is currently taking an Epsom salt bath, worrying about you. In case you were wondering; doctors recommend that one who has this flu should drink enough fluid to keep their mouth moist and their urine light yellow to clear. As the diarrhea and/or vomiting subsides, one may slowly introduce soft foods into the diet. Soft foods are jello, saltine crackers, pudding, rice, bread and soups without meats. It is important to watch for abdominal cramping, retching or liquid stools while trying to resume a normal diet, these symptoms could indicate the intestines are still inflamed from the infection and need more time to heal. We will all probably be feeling these same symptoms real soon because of the effects from all of the OIL IN THE GULF (see what I did there?).
Word to your Mother, Mrs. Professor Chaos


Blueberry said...

Aaack. Feel better soon.

sunshine said...

I'm glad it's you and not me, Mrs. Professor Chaos, that is cleaning THAT toilet.
Living with 4 guys, I've got problems of my own... :P

Hope that you feel better soon Prof!


Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

You look after our boy there. We need him back up and crabby soon. Oh and I DID see what you did there and it was impressive. Most newbies can't complete the loop or even attempt it. Good job.

Professor Chaos said...

Thanks, everybody. Feeling better now.

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