The Pizza Hut down the street has a sign boasting New Simplified prices! All pizzas are $8, $10 or $12. Apparently, there's a national campaign based on the new pricing.
Oh, brilliant! You figured out the problem. The prices were just too complicated.That's why we weren't eating there. It had nothing to do with the poor quality of your product, nothing to do with the fact that i waould rather crawl on my hands and knees to Westside Pizza or Pizza Antico than have your pizza-like product delivered, no it was the confusion I always felt when trying to pay.
I was like a tourist in a foreign country, shoving handfuls of crumpled bills at the cashier and asking is this enough? Because who am I, Pythagoras? What, I'm supposed to just add up all these numbers that end in like .99 in my head? And the coupons, my God, the coupons. I always ended up curled up on the Pizza Hut floor crying like a baby. Well, technically, that wasn't until after eating your pizza! Zing!