Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Defending the Indefensible

First up: Bill Donohue on Larry King says that these priests aren't really pedophiles, since most of the boys they abused were post-pubescent. And of course, the real problem with the church is, wait for it. . . .The gays! What a shock! The seething ragetard thinks the gays are the problem!



I can not for the life of me understand why American Catholics allow this hateful moron to speak for them. If I were a Catholic, I would punch Bill Donohue in the dick. Actually, I would anyway, just on principle.

Next, Ross Douthat who is somehow allowed to write for the actual, honest-to-god New York Times, blames the Seventies. Really.

http://www.bookmark2007.com/photos/Ross%20Douthat.jpg(This picture is not doctored or photo-shopped, he really does look like this!)

In reality, the scandal implicates left and right alike. The permissive sexual culture that prevailed everywhere, seminaries included, during the silly season of the ’70s deserves a share of the blame, as does that era’s overemphasis on therapy. (Again and again, bishops relied on psychiatrists rather than common sense in deciding how to handle abusive clerics.)



Batting third, it's perennial asshole Newt Gingrich defending people who have made death threats to congressmen and senators who voted for healthcare:

http://img.timeinc.net/time/quotes/2007/07/0730_gingrich.jpg
“I’m happy to condemn any effort to engage in personal threats," Gingrich says. "But I think that the Democratic leadership has to take some real responsibility for running a machine that used corrupt tactics that bullied people and enraged much of the American People.”


So, yeah, I really don't like people making death threats, but I gotta say they had it coming. And this is a guy who is probably going to run for president making this morally bankrupt and completely disingenuous argument.

And in the cleanup spot, it's some horrid little person named Monica Crowley writing in the Washington Times in defense of the cop-killer Hutaree Militia:
http://www.complex.com/blogs/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/crowley.jpg
The Democrats handle dissent by isolating it, smearing it and delegitimizing it in order to crush it. The warning should be clear: If you have small-government, traditional values, you may be considered by your own leadership to be an enemy of the state.

As if on cue, this week, Homeland Security, the FBI and the Department of Justice's Joint Terrorism Task Force carried out raids against a purported "Christian militia group" in the Midwest. According to reports, nine people have been charged with plotting to kill police officers with "weapons of mass destruction." The indictment describes the group as an "anti-government extremist organization" and the FBI special agent in charge, Andrew Arena, cast it as "radical and fringe." That may be, but the description has a conveniently familiar ring to it.

It's mind-blowingly coincidental that these raids on a supposedly "Christian" militia group would come at the exact moment that Democrats were trying to change public opinion on Obamacare by claiming persecution by their opponents. They have cast Tea Partiers, conservatives, independents, Christians and militia members as all cut from the same unstable, volatile cloth. How can anyone take their opposition to the Democrats' agenda seriously when they're toting guns and being raided by Homeland Security and the FBI? They're all nuts, don't you know?


Oh, it's just awful how these poor little "Christian" folks are being smeared by the big bad Obama administration. All they wanted to do was kill a few cops and ignite a civil war! And for that, they're being portrayed as dangerous and unstable? It's all just so unfair!

Ruining Sarah's Joke

So, How





Um, OK I guess.  So far. You know, not too bad.

Wait, What?

Gawd, Mom! Your jokes never work!


But he was supposed to say. . .




Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Hold On, Ladies! The Solution to All Your Problems is On the Way!

Teri Hatcher to the Rescue!

NEW YORK (AP) — Teri Hatcher is launching a Web project titled
"A Chick's Guide to Life."
Hatcher said the site will offer "solutions to the needs and obligations of today's modern woman."


Because who knows more about the problems that average women face than Teri Hatcher?
http://people.virginia.edu/~sgv6f/Hius_316/images/Housewives1_468x502.jpg

Get ready for sage advice from someone who once played Lois Lane, and was on an episode of Seinfeld!

Here are a few sneak previews that I totally made up:

Trouble with your kids? Why not hire a separate nanny for each?

Struggling to lose weight? Maybe your personal trainer should be coming to your house twice a day? Or maybe your dietician needs to have a word with your kitchen staff!

Money woes? Don't be afraid to make a quick buck doing made-for-TV movies. Lifetime is always hiring!

Can't decide between the Mercedes and the Lexus? Why not get both?


http://www.virginmedia.com/images/1bondgirl-gal-elektra.jpg

And don't miss Teri's tips on making love with Pierce Brosnan! (hint: think handcuffs!)

Monday, March 29, 2010

Fuck You, CNN

What the hell is CNN doing putting lying libelist Erick Erickson on the air?

And then letting him toss out these patrhetic little explanations for his disgusting comments, like "I meant to call someone else Joseph Goebels," or I've grown up since I called David Souter a "goat-fucking child molester?"

And then you just sit there and accept his complete bullshit at face value and pretend like he isn't a complete asshole?



Erick Erickson adds nothing to the political discourse except vulgarity, name-calling and dishonesty. CNN used to have standards. Ted Turner must be rolling over in his what, ranch? farm? wherever it is he's living out in Montana or whatever. Come back, Ted. We need you.

Oh, and since I have yet to mature as a blogger, it is apparently Okay for me to state that Erick Erickson is a baby-murdering kitten rapist. Which he totally is. Raped a kitten yesterday, just to whet his appetite for infanticide. Erick Erickson. Kills babies. Can I be on CNN now?

Saturday, March 27, 2010

Under The weather

The Chaos Compound has been hit with an outbreak of flu-like symptoms, which we can only assume was caused by some sort of biological weapon introduced by our enemies. We're on to you, haters of goodness! You won't get away with this!

Hopefully, we'll be back up and at it tomorrow or the next day.