Crazy Candidate of the Day -- Sexy Cleavagey Edition

This is Carey Torrice:






Carey would like to be re-elected as county commissioner for Macomb County, Michigan.

That's right, RE-elected.

According to her website, she is not only county commissioner, but also an actress, model, and Private Eye!

And if you don't believe that she's a real actress, she has a photo gallery of herself with famous celebrities to prove it. Like this one:

Carey meets Chelsea Handler - Photo

Carey meets and chats with the best-selling author during her book signing tour in Birmingham, MI.

You think they let just anyone wander into Borders and meet a celebrity who's there to meet people and sell books? No no my friend, that's A-listers only!

And speaking of A-Listers -- It's Frank!



Frank Sinatra with Carey











Frank Sinatra's Vegas impersonator takes
the Rat Pack Show
to MCC's Performing Arts Center







Also, she does foot modeling. Seriously, she has a section of her website dedicated to foot modeling.

Foot Modeling

Carey Torrice is also a foot model. Carey's feet are shown in Nailco's advertisements.

Why should you vote for Ms. Torrice? Well just look at her position on physical fitness!

Carey Torrice stresses physical fitness

And does she support the troops? Boy, does she!

Carey Supporting Our Troops - Photo

I am the daughter of a U.S. Marine. I fully support our men and women in uniform! Semper Fi! Plus, one of these ladies is apparently County Commissioner Carey Torrice: Carey as an official hottie at the Hottiefest Was her opponent ever named an "official hottie?" Probably not. And just check out this photo's caption: Carey Torrice on the set of a movie she filmed That's right A Movie. A movie that she filmed. You know who else was in a movie? Ronald Reagan! And he went on to be president. Just sayin'. If that's not enough to convince you, get a load of this! So all that seems kinda weird for her own campaign website, but is it really crazy? No, here's the crazy part: From the Detroit Free Press: This time, Torrice, 33, and her husband, Michael Torrice, 39, of Fraser are under investigation following a mysterious accident in which an acquaintance and fellow private investigator appeared to hurl himself at an SUV driven by Jeffery Sprys, Carey Torrice's opponent in the Aug. 3 Democratic primary, according to a May 27 police report. That night, just moments after the crash, police stopped the Torrices a few blocks from the scene. Police said they found Michael Torrice with an unregistered handgun, and the car had an unregistered license plate. Sprys has told police that Michael Torrice has been following him and going through his garbage on the curb. So please consider voting for Carey Torrice for County Commissioner this Fall. Remember. . . .

Crazy Candidate of the Day

Today's Crazy Candidate:

Nevada's Sharon Angle!



Seriously insane Nevada Tea Partier Sharron Angle is running against Harry Reid for the US Senate.

And if she can't beat him in the voting booth, well there's always another option:

“I hope that’s not where we’re going, but, you know, if this Congress keeps going the way it is, people are really looking toward those Second Amendment remedies and saying, ‘my goodness what can we do to turn this country around?’ I’ll tell you the first thing we need to do is take Harry Reid out.”

Yep, like the old saying goes, if you can't beat him, call openly for his assassination!


And she knows what to do about the oil disaster in the Gulf:

QUESTION: You have been in support of onshore drilling in the United States as well as offshore drilling, are you rethinking that policy with what is going on in Louisiana?

ANGLE: No. I think that what happened in Louisiana was an accident. They're cleaning it up. We need to go forward and talk about prevention and not about whether we keep it out all together. We know that lot of the problems that have been caused for us with foreign policy and even with our own gas prices here domestically going up is our dependence upon foreign oil.

We have oil reserves and petroleum reserves that we should tap into. And that's a policy that we really need to look at as a nation. How do we deregulate enough to invite our industries to come back into the United States and quit outsourcing their business? (source)

Also, she believes that God has a plan for everyone. Unfortunately, that plan may include your being raped and impregnated,(audio) but you can't win 'em all!


And she understands about families. She has a well-though-out stance on family issues:

"Right now, we say in a traditional home one parent stays home with the children and the other provides the financial support for that family," she said. "That is the acceptable and right thing to do. If we begin to expand that, not only do we dilute the resources that are available, we begin to dilute things like health care, retirement, all the things offered to families that help them be a family."(huffpo)

Sure, it's incoherent, but what has Harry Reid ever done about the dilution of resources? Hmm?

So when you go to the polls this election season, and you live in Nevada, consider Sharron Angle for US Senate! Then hold your nose and vote for Harry Reid.

Sugar!!!

(Stolen From Boing-Boing)



I don't know how old this ad is, but I'm guessing that wouldn't be a very convincing argument today.

New Rules For Confirmation Hearings

Rule # 1: If you are incapable of pronouncing the word "accurate," you are not allowed to question a Supreme Court nominee.



Rule # 2: If you use your allotted time to ask a Jewish woman where she celebrated Christmas, you are no longer to be allotted any time at any future hearing.



Rule # 3: If you use any portion of your allotted time to ask the nominee about "Twilight," you are no longer permitted to speak in public on any subject, and must resign in disgrace.

Congratulations, US Workers!

From Bloomberg News:

Jobless Produce U.S. Profit on Productivity

With Less Inflation

By Steve Matthews - Jun 28, 2010

Yea!!!! Great job, everyone! Your unemployment is helping companies realize awesome profits without any of that pesky inflation that might drive your wages upward somewhat!
Way to go!

The 6.8 million Americans out of work for 27 weeks or longer -- a record 46 percent of all the unemployed -- are providing U.S. companies with an eager, skilled and cheap labor pool. This is allowing businesses to retool their workforces, boosting efficiency and profits following the deepest recession since the 1930s, and contributing to a 61 percent rise in the Standard & Poor’s 500 Index since March 2009.

So, quit whining about not being able to find work. You're helping to increase corporate stock prices! And isn't that really what matters?

“Companies are getting higher-productivity employees for the same or lower wage rate they were paying a marginal employee,” said James Paulsen, who helps oversee about $375 billion as chief investment strategist at Wells Capital Management in Minneapolis. “Not only are employees higher skilled, you have a better skill match. You have a more productive and more adaptive labor force.

”

Translation: "more productive" = doing more work for the same pay.
"more adaptive" = these people are so afraid of losing their jobs, they'll figure out
a way to deal with whatever shit you throw at them!

No more coal for you, Cratchit! And you shall labor on Christmas Day and like it!

U.S. productivity gains averaged 2.9 percent from 2000 through the first quarter of 2010, compared with 2.1 percent in 1990-1999 and 1.5 percent in 1980-1989, according to the Labor Department. The increased efficiency has helped improve earnings, with more than 80 percent of companies in the S&P 500 index reporting profits that exceeded the consensus analysts’ estimates during the most recent quarter, Bloomberg data show.

So the bad news is you're working harder than ever, but the good news is, your company's profits are way up!

“Very specific skill sets is what will get people hired these days,” said Gary Townsend, president of Hill-Townsend Capital LLC in Chevy Chase, Maryland, a hedge fund that specializes in financial firms. “Companies are able to slice off the weakest members of the team and find very highly qualified and motivated [read: desperate] replacements. There is very little wage pressure.”

So, cheer up, American workers! Because higher stock prices means the economy is better! Whether you have a decent job or not is not really relevant.

P.S. Here's one more line from the Bloomberg article, lest we forget:

The U.S. economy grew at a 2.7 percent annual rate in the first quarter, less than the 3 percent estimate issued last month, according to Commerce Department data released June 25. The economy contracted in five quarters during the recession that began in December 2007, the worst performance since the Great Depression.

So no, FOXies, history didn't begin in January 2009.