Religious Lunatics in Positions of Responsibility

These guys were both very recently in positions of serious responsibility.

First up: Tom DeLay




Tom Delay apparently actually thinks that God himself took pen in hand and actually wrote the Constitution. Not the Bible, the Constitution.
Tom DeLay really seems to believe that the United States of America was founded, not by George Washington and Thomas Jefferson and John Adams, etc. but by God. And that at some point in our history, the United States did not have a secular government

 

Pictured: The Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost

(apparently)

I mean, I know right-wing religious fanatics are always claiming that the Constitution is based on the Bible, or Christian principles, even though a cursory reading of the document would actually disabuse one of that notion pretty quickly, but I don't think I've ever heard anyone actually claim that God actually wrote the damn thing.

And this man was the House majority leader. He was in a position of serious responsibility, one of the main forces setting our nation's legislative agenda. And he used his position to seal off the capitol rotunda? Is he even allowed to do that? And his plan to improve the nation was to have a bunch of Congressmen falling to their knees in the rotunda so that God would "heal our land?" Honestly, you could do that at home, you don't need to be a fucking Congressman to "seek the face of God." Wouldn't it make more sense to just stay home and kneel and pray and leave being a Congressman to those who would solve problems by legislating?



Next up: Gen Jerry Boykin (Ret)





Here's what General Boykin had to say recently about the second coming

The Lord is a warrior and in Revelation 19 is says when he comes back, he’s coming back as what? A warrior. A mighty warrior leading a mighty army, riding a white horse with a blood-stained white robe…. I believe that blood on that robe is the blood of his enemies ‘cause he’s coming back as a warrior carrying a sword.

Um, first of all, have you ever actually read that fever-dream of a book, Revelations? It's like William Burroughs without all the buttsex. (which admittedly doesn't leave all that much) It's fucking nuts. You're really going to take that book seriously? 
I was raised pretty fundamentalist, and even we were taught that Revelations is all symbolism. (I think the prevailing scholarly opinion is that all the bad things in Revelations, the dragons and monsters and what-not, are all cleverly-disguised allusions to the Roman Empire)

Secondly, Jesus wears a blood-stained robe? Why would you assume that's the blood of his enemies? Might it not have to do with his hands and feet having nails driven through them? And thorns sticking into his head?

The Lord is a warrior and in Revelation 19 is says when he comes back, he's coming back as what? A warrior. A might warrior leading a mighty army, riding a white horse with a blood-stained white robe ... I believe that blood on that robe is the blood of his enemies 'cause he's coming back as a warrior carrying a sword.  - See more at: http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/boykin-when-jesus-comes-back-hell-be-carrying-ar-15-assault-rifle#sthash.M0bMjk2R.dpuf

The Lord is a warrior and in Revelation 19 is says when he comes back, he's coming back as what? A warrior. A might warrior leading a mighty army, riding a white horse with a blood-stained white robe ... I believe that blood on that robe is the blood of his enemies 'cause he's coming back as a warrior carrying a sword.  - See more at: http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/boykin-when-jesus-comes-back-hell-be-carrying-ar-15-assault-rifle#sthash.M0bMjk2R.dpuf

Thirdly, Why would God need a sword? He's God. From what we've learned from the preceding books of the Bible, he can conjure up fire, floods, famine, pestilence. He can have all the first-born killed. He can heal the sick, raise the dead, and make the little girls talk out of their heads.
(wait, that last bit was Johnny Rivers)
Anyway, why would he need a sword when he could kill anyone he wants to by saying the word?
And if you're really taking all this Revelations stuff literally, then this next bit doesn't quite fit:

And I believe now – I’ve checked this out – I believe that sword he’ll be carrying when he comes back is an AR-15…. The sword today is an AR-15

 So, if you're taking this all literally, why isn't a sword a sword? You say God is literally coming back on a literal horse in a literal blood-stained robe, but when he says "sword," he probably means that as a metaphor for an AR-15? And why so specific? Couldn't God conjure up some sort of super Star Wars gun that no one had ever seen before? Why would he use a gun that any nut can get at any gun show?






And now, Boykin goes for some sort of wingnut gold medal by being perhaps the first lunatic to sombine the second coming with the second amendment.

Now I want you to think about this: where did the Second Amendment come from? ... From the Founding Fathers, it's in the Constitution. Well, yeah, I know that. But where did the whole concept come from? It came from Jesus when he said to his disciples 'now, if you don't have a sword, sell your cloak and buy one.' 

I know, everybody says that was a metaphor.  IT WAS NOT A METAPHOR! He was saying in building my kingdom, you're going to have to fight at times. You won't build my kingdom with a sword, but you're going to have to defend yourself.  And that was the beginning of the Second Amendment, that's where the whole thing came from. I can't prove that historically and David will counsel me when this is over, but I know that's where it came from.

Holy shit! There's one I've never heard before. Where in the hell does he come up with that? Has any historian ever found any shred of evidence that any of the founders were thinking of that Bible verse when they wrote the second amendment? (And David Barton doesn't count?) 

This man was fucking United States Army general! I had no idea he was this insane. I know he got drummed out of the Army because even the Bush administration found his anti-Muslim rhetoric embarrassing, but holy fuck, he's a loony!
It's terrifying to think that this man once commanded an Army! It's a miracle that this nut never invaded Saudi Arabia, or Dearborn, MI!

A Reminder to Republicans

Just a Reminder to any Republicans out there.

  This is your guy.

This is the face of your once-proud party:
 



This is what you've become. You are now the party of a guy who refers to the President of the United States as a "sub-human mongrel."

You are now the party of a man who waves around machine guns while threatening members of Congress.


Because this scumbag, this nasty, vile little shitbag, has been given the approval of your party again and again and again.


I don't know why he has suddenly become an issue, campaigning with Greg Abbot for Governor of Texas, but Nugent has had his ring kissed by the leading lights of the right for some time now.

Remember this?


Your standard-bearer in the last election went to Nugent to ask for his endorsement.
Did anyone in your party object?
  Did anyone even point out that it was, let's ay "unseemly" for a man who wants to be the President to associate himself with a man who threatened the life of the current one? A man who called the Secretary of State a "worthless bitch" and suggested she ride his machine gun out of town?


And of course, it's not just him.




Remember this once and future presidential candidate jamming with Uncle Ted, doing a song about fucking underage groupies?

 Family Values!









And did anyone in your party object when one of your asshole teabagging Congressmen invited this scumbag to the State of the Goddamm Union Address?  Did any of the leaders of your pathetic little party have the balls to stand up and say "no, Steve Stockamn, you can not invite this 'man' to the SOTU. You can not bring a man who has threatened the life of the President in to a room in which the President will be speaking, have some goddamm common decency!"

No, no one in your party mad a fucking peep.
And no one said a word when the Congressman called Nugent a Great American or Patriot or whatever the fuck he said about him. You were all fine with having this scumbag in the halls of Congress as long as it was a thumb in the eye of President Obama!

So, just a reminder of how things work.

You get the Nuge.












We get the Boss   














We get Janeane Garofalo


 You get Victoria Jackson


we get Matt Damon and Ben Affleck 




You get Jon Voigt, Frazier, and Cliff from Cheers.

 

 

We get Tina Fey, You get Sarah Palin

You're done. It's over. We win.

Least Self-Aware Person in the World

Guess who posted this?

“Lazy hands make a man poor, but diligent hands bring wealth.” Proverbs 10:4 

I came across this Scripture and wanted to pass it along.  I love it because it reminds me of my parents and the work ethic they instilled in all of us kids. If you want something, you go out and work for it.
No one owes you anything, and I’m embarrassed to be in a generation that doesn’t have that mindset.
Honest, hard work, is the only way to do it right. Don’t rely on anyone to provide for you.
The world doesn’t owe you anything!


Can you guess? Can you guess which advocate for the work ethic posted this?

  

Yep, Bristol Palin!

Bristol Palin, who I'm pretty sure has never done an honest day's work in her life, posted this scolding of America's youth for not being hard-working enough.

Irony is dead.

Roll this sentence around in your noggin for a second:

 I love it because it reminds me of my parents and the work ethic they instilled in all of us kids.

Really. Your parents?  YOUR parents?

Okay, I don't know much about your dad, but your mom instilled a work ethic in you? When was that? Was it while she was pissing off the McCain team by refusing to do the debate prep or do her homework before interviews, or learn anything?

Maybe it was when she quit her job halfway through for reasons that she never could make entirely clear.

Or maybe when she had FOX build a studio in her house so she could toss her word-salads without even having to drive down to the local affiliate.

And whatever work ethic your parents instilled in you, I'm not sure it really took. Because when have you ever done anything that could be described as "work?"

No one owes you anything, and I’m embarrassed to be in a generation that doesn’t have that mindset.

Honest, hard work, is the only way to do it right. Don’t rely on anyone to provide for you.

Yeah, honest, hard work! It's just disgusting how many of today's young people will just sit around expecting to be given reality TV shows just because they're related to someone famous!

Or how many kids just expect to be paid money to promote abstinence just because they're unwed teenage mothers!

Or how these darn kids today just think that they should be handed book deals just because their mothers give Bill Kristol a chubby.

 



Irony is dead and Bristol Palin just pissed on its corpse.


I knew this guy looked familiar!

 I saw this story a while ago:

Securities Fraud Investigation Nabs Ohio Republican Along With A 'Secretive' Church





And I thought the guy in the picture looked familiar.

Ohio state representative, Peter Beck (R-54) was just indicted on 53 counts. He already is facing 16 felony counts from an indictment last July.

Hmm, no. . . name doesn't ring a bell. . .


but he definitely looks familiar.

 

 

Hmmmm. . . where have I seen this guy before?

Then it hit me.



Oh my God, it's Robert Blake from Lost Highway!

Yep, that's him!

Random Thoughts

1.   Just watched Room 237 on Netflix. Now I rally really want to watch the Shining again, but Netflix doesn't have it. Neither does Hulu. Neither does the library. How am I to go on living?

 

If you haven't seen Room 237, I definitely recommend it. It's all about the various theories people have developed about various levels of meaning in Stanley Kubrick's film The Shining. They range from the entirely plausible (Kubrick meant the film as an allegory for the Holocaust and/or the Native American genocide) to the far-out (Kubrick uses The Shining to confess to his part in faking the moon landing). It's totally fascinating, and really makes me want to re-watch the Shining, since I had thought that the film was mainly an experiment in how much scenery Jack Nicholson could chew. (spoiler alert: A LOT!)

 

You can almost see bits of the Overlook Hotel stuck in his teeth!

2.    Endorsements are out of control. I just saw an ad that said Makita is the "official tools of the Mexican National Soccer Team." Why? Why would any tools be the official tools of the Mexican National Soccer team? I could understand if they said "Adidias, the official cleats of the National soccer team," because they use cleats and presumably would have their choice of any brand and if they chose Adidias that would be a pretty strong endorsement. But Makita? Why would you want to be the official tools of a soccer team? Soccer teams don't use hand tools, they don't even used hands! 

Pretty much any time you see that some brand is the "official ____ of _____" it's going to be bullshit. Did you know that McDonalds is the "official restaurant of the Olympics?" That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. First of all, McDonalds is not a restaurant. Restaurants serve food. And secondly, does anyone think that any Olypmic athletes are setting foot in McDonalds? 

 

Think she eats a lot of french fries?

Okay, maybe Sean White, but only when he's really stoned.

3.    Do you think George Zimmerman even knows he's lying anymore?

George Zimmerman: ‘I Certainly Was A Victim’

George Zimmerman still believes that he was a victim the night he shot and killed unarmed teenager Trayvon Martin. ”I certainly was a victim when I was having my head bashed into the concrete and my nose broken and beaten,” Zimmerman told CNN on Monday. ” So I wouldn’t say I was not a victim.”

Does he even know anymore, or has he told the lie so many times he actually has started to believe it?

Oh, and while we're on the subject, please God let this story be true!

George Zimmerman chased by angry mob in Miami

By Adrienne Cutway, Orlando Sentinel

9:08 a.m. EST, February 19, 2014

 4.    Bob 2 died.  He was only 61.

The biggest shame is that most people will only remember Devo as the guys who wore flowerpot hats and sang "Whip It" and the theme from Dr. Detroit. Sure, Devo could create perfect pop songs like "Girl U Want" or "Through Being Cool," but they also produced some of the most innovative, subversive music ever heard. They were amazing enough to impress David Bowie and Iggy Pop, who helped them get a record deal. (on Warner Bros, no less. The Seventies were a crazy time!)

Check out some of their art-damaged early work: