Hey, Jagoffs! Just because I've been mentioned a few times on this here blog-thingy doesn't mean I'm endorsing it. So when the "SarahPac" ads come up. I better not catch any of you lower-48 not-real Americans clicking on them. "Cuz every time you do, I gotta pay the Perfessor a couple of bucks.
Seriously, if you have any respect for me at all, you will not click on the SarahPac ads!
If I catch any of you clicking on the ads just to try and cost me money, me and one of my kids will hunt you down and gut you like this fuckin' moose!
Yeah! That moose bitch won't be messin' with me any time soon!
You think I'm joking? I will quit whatever it is I'm doing at the time and come after you hardcore! You betcha! And I won't stop until you're dead, 'cuz I'm no quitter!
You feel lucky punk? Click on the ads for SarahPac! I dare ya! Make my frikkin' day!