Crazy Candidat of the Day - Mel Brooks Edition

Today's Crazy candidate is California's Mattie Fein!



I don't know who the hell Mattie Fein is, but she approves of this message:



My favorite part is at the end, whenre the placard reads "Approved by Mattie Fein, Parid for by Mattie Fein for Congress" She adds in parentheses (obligatry McCain-Feingold anti-free speech message) then in smaller, but still parenthetical type: (which was passed to protect multi-millionaire-career-politician incumbents) Apparently, true freedom requires that attack ads be permitted to be published anonymously? I guess?

Anyway, I haven't been able to find out much about her, but according to her website, she "has served as Communications Director for the American Freedom Agenda, an organization devoted to restoring checks and balances and protections against government abuses."

Unfortunately, their website seems to no longer be in existence, but an article about the group from 2008 state that they favor:

renouncing the use of presidential signing statements to claim a right to disobey laws; ending threats to prosecute journalists who write about classified matters; and promising to use regular courts rather than military commissions to try terrorism suspects. The full pledge is posted on the group's website, AmericanFreedomAgenda.org. [don't bother clicking]

which sounds not crazy at all.
But come on, that was one crazy ad!

Erick Erickson Just Got Even Nuttier Somehow

Bear in mind that Erick Erickson is an actual elected official in Macon, GA.

By Faith: I Am Proud of Franklin Graham

Posted by Erick Erickson (Profile)

Sunday, August 22nd at 9:00AM EDT

Okay, so you know this is going to be nutty. He's going to be sticking up for Graham's jerk-off comments about Barack Obama being "born Muslim." But first, he starts off with a strange verse from the book of Hebrews:

All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance. And they admitted that they were aliens and strangers on earth. People who say such things show that they are looking for a country of their own. If they had been thinking of the country they had left, they would have had opportunity to return. Instead, they were longing for a better country—a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them.

— Hebrews 11:13-16 (NIV)

I'm not sure what that verse means. Apparently, if you get to Heaven and decide "ehh, this is not for me," you get the opportunity to return to earth? I don't know. Maybe it will make sense in the context of the article. But I wouldn't bet on it!

Much has been made this week of Franklin Graham’s comments both about the Ground Zero Mosque and Barack Obama’s religion. It has been more than hilarious to watch all the news networks, newspapers, and pundits try to explain Graham’s comments.

I know my sides were splitting!

All of those who have been talking about his comments have talked about them from a political point of view.

Franklin Graham could care less. I could care less. What Franklin Graham said is dead on.

Okay, I think what you mean to say is that you could NOT care less. If you could care less, then you do in fact care, at least a little bit. Like I could probably care less about NASCAR, but it's hard to imagine how.

Specifically, this week Graham noted that Barack Obama was born a muslim.

“I think the president’s problem is that he was born a Muslim, his father was a Muslim. The seed of Islam is passed through the father like the seed of Judaism is passed through the mother. He was born a Muslim, his father gave him an Islamic name,” Graham told CNN’s John King in a televised interview that aired Thursday night.

So, apparently, Franklin Graham thinks that there is some sort of "Muslim gene" or some type of Muslim pathogen that is transmitted from generation to generation. That even though little Barack never really knew his father, he still inherited the Muslim pre-disposition through genetics? Or something?

Also, is Graham saying that Obama's mother was Jewish, or that just generally, the Jewish gene is passed from the distaff side of the family tree? There's no Jewish gene on the y chromosome?

Likewise, Graham said if the State Department paid him or another Christian to do outreach, there’d be all sorts of outcry. But, due to double standards, there was no outcry over the State Department putting the Ground Zero mosque imam on the payroll.

Maybe because that was done by George W. Bush's administration? And maybe because we don't have any need to convince the world that we are not at war with Christendom, so it would be extremely silly to hire Frank Graham to do outreach to Christians?

First, about Barack Obama’s faith — it is clear when he was enrolled in school in Indonesia his parents listed his faith as Islam. The New York Times, in 2008, buttressed that. One is not born into Islam (Rev. Graham got that point technically wrong), but as Streiff has pointed out, at one time his parents listed his religion as “Islam.”

Oh, he got that "technically wrong" did he? He came thiiiis close to being right on that one? Just a technicality. Technically, he was dead fucking wrong in a pretty insane, stupid, and ignorant way. Technically.

Also, not to nitpick, but listing his religion as "Islam" was the only way to get him accepted into the better school, but sure, let's just go ahead and assume that that was a binding legal document which cemented his Musliminess.

Barack Obama says he converted to Christianity. Just like Hillary Clinton, we will take him at his word. If he claims he converted and has taken advantage of the gifts of the spirit without a true conversion, that is between him and God.

Yeah, I suspect that he may have converted without having a conversion. Which is like taking a walk without walking, or having dinner without eating. Very sad, I pity him.

I pity him if his conversion is insincere. “For if the message spoken by angels was binding, and every violation and disobedience received its just punishment, how shall we escape if we ignore such a great salvation?” (Heb. 2:2-3a)

Wha??? I don't get it. What does that have to do with. . . you know what, forget it. I don't want to know.

I await calls from the birthers for the baptismal certificate.

Ha! I mock the crazy birthers to make myself look relatively sane by comparison! I'm not crazy, just because I think that Barack Obama might be lying about his religious beliefs in order to, um, to do something. Something bad, probably?

In any event, it is beside the point. Franklin Graham does not speak as a man of the political world, but a man of faith.

A man of faith who goes on a political TV show to talk about political things. Obviously he cares nothing for your silly politics!

His view, and mine, is a reliance, by faith, on the Hope of ages past and yet to come — that is Christ against the world.

I thought Christ loved the world. Hence his coming down to it to save it. When did he turn against it?

We live by faith as pilgrims in an alien world headed home to eternity. There are too many people in this world who, when confronted with questions of faith, opt for the polite answer instead of the real answer. By faith and history, Franklin Graham understands that there is only one way, one Truth, and one life. No one goes to the Father except through Jesus Christ. No one.

Powerful words. You know what would really have a strong impact now? A jarring non-sequitur!
Aaaand, in 3. . . 2. . 1. .

That is what our faith teaches us. Shame on the media for dwelling more on Franklin Graham’s words than on the imam of the Ground Zero Mosque. But there is a reason for that too.

Well done. I have whiplash!

Shame on the media for dwelling more on Franklin Graham’s words than on the imam of the Ground Zero Mosque. But there is a reason for that too. The political elites in this world view Islam as, frankly, primitive.

Woah! You may have accidentally said something true there. Just the part about people thinking of Islam as primitive, not the other parts.

The political elites in this world view Islam as, frankly, primitive. “Well of course those crazy guys would believe in something like Sharia,” think the secular political elites. After all, they are several hundred years behind Christianity. Christians have evolved — go to any Episcopalian church and you’ll see a gay priest, a female priest, or what have you.

I'm not sure that anyone really thinks Christians have "evolved." I've never heard anyone say that.

Christians like Graham, and me, are viewed with the same suspicion as muslim clerics who defend their faith, but Graham and you and me. . .

Hey! Leave me out of this!

Christians like Graham, and me, are viewed with the same suspicion as muslim clerics who defend their faith, but Graham and you and me will be questioned because, after all, Christianity is supposed to be more evolved. Therefore, for us to hold true to our faith means there must be something wrong with us individually, not with the religion. (This, of course, is at a superficial level. Theologically, and I’m not going to explore the depths of this here, it is because the world persecutes Christians because the world is against Christ.)

The world persecutes Christians. Yeah, that's so true. The world is totally anti-Christian. You know, except for most of Europe, the USA, Latin America. . . but hey, China, Sudan and parts of the Middle East is pretty much the whole world.

By faith we believe, we persevere, and we know that there will be a last day and a final judgment. On that day we who persevere win because Christ wins against this world. It is that simple. It is that offensive. It is precisely that which our secular media and political elites do not understand and cannot grasp. That is why they dwell on Franklin Graham and the political impact of his words. These people live for the now.

Franklin Graham and all those who follow Christ live for eternity.

So why is Franklin Graham putting his nose into earthly affairs? Why should it matter to him who builds what where or what faith the President is if these temporal issues are only important to the secular media and political elites? And if he doesn't want the secular media dwelling on his words, why speak those words on a secular TV show? Also, I still don't get the Hebrews thing from the beginning of the article. But then, I'm guessing neither do you.

SUNDAY FUNNIES

Sargeant Katie was considered the toughest drill instructor in the entire Corps

Got a shipment of lion cubs for you -- Oh, goddammit! They double-shipped again!



The 53rd Gams Division usually encountered little resistance.

Noah Cyrus is Carving out her niche in the family as the "Smart One."

So "Talented One" is still available!

Add to Favorites

Ew, no thanks. I just became a vegetarian!

Yes, you do.

I don't know if this last one is funny or sad. Probably a little of both.

Amazon Customer Review of the Day

You know, Einstein was OK, but I don't know if he can measure up to the standards of an insane butthole lady that wrote some stupid shitty books!

Art Cars at Folkfest

Here are some pictures of "Art Cars" that were parked outside of this year's Folkfest:



This is Chris Hubbards "Heaven and Hell Car" (link)


















I have no idea whose truck/van thingie this is, but it's pretty darn cool.



This car belongs to Deacon Gary, the GA Mojo Man. Creator and purveyor of handcrafted spiritual curios and allegedly genuine souvenir mojos [his words]. (link)




This vehicle belongs to C.M. and Grace Kelly Laster (link)







And I don't know, but I suspect that this truck may belong to Grahame Eggleston, given his affinity for bottle caps (link)

Glenn Beck and Ann Coulter Might as Well Just Go Ahead and Gay-Marry Each Other!

The AFA keeps sending me things. Things like this:

Ann Coulter, Glenn Beck go AWOL in the culture war

Which is weird, because if there's one thing those two enjoy, it's a culture war. Or an actual war, as long as someone else is doing the actual fighting.

Count Ann Coulter and Glenn Beck as the latest deserters in the culture war and in the battle for sexual normalcy. They have flinched at “precisely that little point which the world and the devil....are attacking,” and so have forfeited the right to consider themselves any longer culture warriors.

So now they're going to have to consider themselves what, normal people? Cuz that ain't gonna work!

Ann Coulter is the headliner at “Homocon 2010,” a September 25 gathering of so-called gay “conservatives.”

Really "Homocon?" Is that a thing?


Um, yeah. Apparently it is:

It's apparently put on by the group "GOProud" which is an organization of gay homosexuals dedicated to supporting the party that would deny basic rights to gay homosexuals. It's kind of like a "Chickens for Colonel Sanders" sort of an outfit.

So here is what GOProud believes:

What we believe

We are Republicans and conservatives who believe in limited government, individual liberty, free markets, a strong national defense and a confident foreign policy. We believe that every individual should be equal under the law.

You know, every individual except ourselves!

GOProud’s Conservative Agenda

The so-called “gay agenda” is defined by the left through a narrow prism of legislative goals. While hate crimes and employment protections may be worthy goals, there are many other important priorities that receive little attention from the gay community. GOProud’s agenda emphasizes conservative and libertarian principles that will improve the daily lives of all Americans, but especially gay and lesbian Americans.

Really. Some may think that protecting gay folks from being beaten up and fired is maybe a worthy goal, but those people are totally gay! What's really important to the gay people is a "confident foreign policy" and "free markets!"

1 – TAX REFORM - Death tax repeal; domestic partner tax equity, and other changes to the tax code that will provide equity for gays and lesbians;

Because right now, gays and lesbians are totally getting screwed on this whole "death tax" thing. This is so much more important than hate crimes and employment protection.

2 – HEALTHCARE REFORM – Free market healthcare reform.

Okay, the "free market" is what we have now for healthcare, so I'm not sure how that would be considered reform.

4 – DON’T ASK, DON’T TELL REPEAL – Repeal of the military’s Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell policy.

Oh, wait. That's part of the narrow prism of the left's "gay agenda." Scratch that last one!

6 – FIGHTING GLOBAL EXTREMISTS – Standing strong against radical regimes who seek to criminalize gays and lesbians

Also, supporting conservative Republican. . . wait, something's not adding up here. Oh, that's right, we're only opposed to discrimination in the name of Allah! As long as it's done in the name of traditional family values, it's just fine with us!

So anyway, these self-loathers invited Ann Coulter to come speak at their little circle jerk and I guess she accepted, and that has apparently touched off a firestorm of ridiculous pearl-clutching outrage on the right.

Ann Coulter Dropped By WND Over GOProud Homocon Appearance

Conservative speaker Ann Coulter has been asked to step down as a keynote speaker at WorldNetDaily’s “Taking America Back National Conference”.

The conference organizers said that it was Coulter’s involvement in “HOMOCON”, an event that is put on my GOProud and represents, “gay conservatives and their allies”, that let to her being booted from the program.

The CEO of WND, Joseph Farah, had a few comments to make about the situation.
“Ultimately as a matter of principle, it would not make sense for us to have Ann speak to a conference about ‘taking America back’ when she clearly does not recognize that the ideals to be espoused there simply do not include the radical and very ‘unconservative’ agenda represented by GOProud,” he said.

"Apparently," he continued," Ms. Coulter has forgotten that we hate fags!"

Although Coulter has defended her agreement with GOProud, she has announced that her speaking at the event does not interfere with her personal beliefs.
“They hired me to give a speech, so I’m giving a speech. I do it all the time,” Coulter said. “I speak to a lot of groups and do not endorse them. Giving a speech is not an endorsement of every position held by the people I’m speaking to.”

"I have no principles," she continued. "I'll take their money, make a stupid speech, then go back to calling them fags and homos as soon as the check clears.

So, anyway, that's the AFA's problem with Coulter.
What's their beef with Beck?

Glenn Beck has completely and shamelessly surrendered on the issue of gay marriage, and did so on Bill O’Reilly’s program, only the most watched cable news program in all TV land.

Beck said “we have bigger fish to fry” than protecting natural marriage, which, outside of being the bedrock and foundation of any healthy society and the cornerstone of Western civilization, is apparently not that important to Mr. Beck.

Oh, because Beck thinks that the bogeymen of his paranoid delusions are scarier than the thought of two dudes getting married. And you think that the two dudes are just the most scariest thing ever, way more than Beck's imaginary Nazis and Stalinists? Is that the problem?

Here’s hoping - and praying - that both of these two former stalwarts in the cause will come to their senses in time to return to their posts on the wall instead of giving aid and comfort to the enemy.

Um, I thought the enemy was Al Queda, not Big Gay Al.

You wanna know how upset the AFA is about these two going all soft on the gay thing? Check this out:

As far as Ronald Reagan’s dictum that "[t]he person who agrees with you 80 percent of the time is a friend and an ally - not a 20 percent traitor," let’s have the average husband try that out on his wife. “Honey, I’m faithful 80% of the time. There’s no reason for you to come after me with the frying pan.”

Yeah. They just dissed Reagan. Ronald Freakin Reagan! That's like a Catholic dissing the Pope, or a Buddhist dissing Buddha. Or a communist dissing Marx. How pissy do they have to be to throw Reagan under the bus just because his "dictum" supports their not jettisoning Beck and Coulter? And it's not like Beck and Coulter are going to stop being totally horrible people.