Weird law-Enforcement News

ATLANTA —

While Sunday's thrilling NFL Playoff game was going on inside the Georgia Dome, outside Federal Agents were busy conducting an undercover sting.
Immigration and Customs Enforcement Agents, (ICE) tell Channel 2 Action News they were searching for illegal NFL products being sold by vendors. 

Okay, that seems pretty straightforward. But a couple paragraphs in , it gets weird.

At a later date, Homeland Security Investigators are expected to bring the sellers who were detained during Sunday's Falcons-Seahawks game, in for questioning. 

Homeland Security. The Department of Homeland Security, which is tasked with, as I understand it, securing the homeland from terrorists, is being used to enforce copyright laws?  Nice priorities, Homeland Security! There are still Al-Queda creeps out there, the right-wing militia movement is gearing up for another 1776, and your big concern is that the Falcons might not be getting their cut of the T-shirt sales? I know I feel safer!

Ask GOPPY, the GOP advice elephant!

Note: GOPPY is not an actual elephant. He represents the personification of the problem-solving skills of today's G.O.P.

Question #1:
Dear GOPPY, the Bush tax cuts created huge deficits. What should be done to correct this?




I know, make the tax cuts permanent!


Question #2: 
Dear GOPPY, de-regulating the banks led them to take huge risks with other peoples' money, crashing the economy and leading to a taxpayer-funded bailout. How can we ensure that this doesn't happen again?

Hmm, let me think. . .




I know, fewer cumbersome regulations! 




Question #3:
Dear GOPPY,  A bunch of kids got killed with guns.
What would you recommend to prevent this from recurring?

 

That's an easy one! More guns!






Question #4:
 Dear GOPPY, My marriage is in trouble because my husband can't forgive me for having an affair.
What can I do to regain his trust?



HMM. . .That is a difficult issue. . .

I know! You should fuck a bunch of different dudes!




Question #5:
Dear GOPPY, I think I may be an alcoholic. I want to stop, but I'm afraid I can't. What should I do?



Try drinking lots of booze!







Goppy the GOP elephant! Doubling down on bad ideas since at least 1980.

Que Sera Sera

When I was Just

A little chiiiild. . .

 

  

I asked my mother

What will I beeeee. . . .

Will I be pretty?

Will I be rich?

 

Here's what she said to meeee. . . 

What Did You Think Was Going To Happen?

Biden, NRA, meet on gun control; NRA sticks to staunchly anti-gun control stance

By Lee-Anne Goodman, The Canadian Press | Associated Press – Thu, Jan 10, 2013

Why would you even invite these people to the table?
If you were convening a task force to discuss fighting organized crime, would you invite a representative from the Gambino family?
Would you invite NAMBLA to brainstorm ideas about reducing sex crimes?

Why would you pretend that these dirtbag lunatics have any shred of credibility?

This story is not what we're talking about.

Mom who shot intruder inspires gun control foes

By By KATE BRUMBACK | Associated Press – Wed, Jan 9, 2013

I know, I know. The gun-humpers are going to use this story to illustrate why there should be no gun-control legislation or regulation and everyone should always be armed at all times and in all places and blah blah blah. But this is NOT what we're talking about!

No one (okay, almost no one) is saying that law-abiding citizens should not be allowed to own guns for personal protection. What we're saying is that there's no reason to allow civilians to own military-grade assault weaponry. We're saying that there is no need to allow magazines that hold 30 rounds, or guns that spray dozens of bullets in seconds, or cop-killer bullets, etc. And we're saying that reasonable regulations ought to be in place to keep lunatics from owning guns, or people with criminal backgrounds, or people who are on the Goddamm TERRORIST WATCH LIST, all of which the NRA and their fellow massacre-enablers firmly oppose.

That's what we're talking about, and no matter how many housewives shoot how many intruders (and good on her, by the way) that doesn't change the need for sensible gun laws.

It's a totally false choice that the NRA types like to perpetuate, that either every nut gets to own whatever machine gun he wants or jack-booted guv'mint thugs kickin' down yer door ta take yer gurns!!!!
It's bullshit, and they know it. We had an assault weapons ban for years, and it didn't prevent any moms from shooting intruders with pistols.