Thursday, March 17, 2011

The Two Reasons I Am Not Wearing Green, So Sue Me.

1. I am not Irish

2. I am not Catholic.

So why would you want me horning in on your holiday anyway?

Honestly, if I was Irish, I'm pretty sure I would be offended by all this "Everyone's Irish Today" crap.

Blondie Cartoon for 03/17/2011
Copyright 2011 by King Features Syndicate, Inc. World rights reserved. 

I'm oretty sure that if I went to an Octoberfest where people were wearing fake lederhosen and swilling beer out of plastic steins and someone said to me "Ach, Efferyone ist German Today," I'd be hard pressed to resist punching him in his non-German mouth for reducing the culture of my ancestors to cheap drunken kitsch.

This is what you think of the land of Goethe, Bach, and Werner Herzog? Fuck you! Gutenberg must be rolling in his grave! 

No, the good one! 

Yeah, the printing press guy.

 Aaaaaanyway, I'm not trying to be a spoilsport. I didn't consciously amke a decision to avoid green. If the first shirt on top of the drawer had been green, I probably wouldn't have put it back out of spite, I didn't even think about it being St. Patrick's day today when I got up this morning. It just doesn't matter to me. It's not my holiday. I don't fast for Ramadan either. It doesn't mean I have anything against those who do. I just don't feel like I need to glom on to someone elses's cultural observances. So sue me.