Monday, June 20, 2011

Florida's Rick Scott is our Nation's Most Pathetic Governor.

Rick Scott, governor of Florida, frightener of small children, and Medicare defrauder, has a website.
Not that there's anything unusual about that, I'm sure most governors have websites.

And maybe a lot of them have a "Take Action" widget

I don't know, and I'm not about to do the research. But I'm guessing that no other governor has anything this sad on his or her website:

Email a Newspaper Editor

There's a drop-down menu with the names of major Florida newspapers, and then the pathetic icing on the pitiful cake: The letter is already written for you!

Dear Editor,

When Rick Scott ran for Governor he promised to create jobs and turn our economy around. I voted for Rick because he’s always been a businessman, not a politician. While politicians usually disappoint us and rarely keep their promises, Rick is refreshing because he’s keeping his word.

Refreshing! That's what I look for in a candidate. Oh, wait. No, I mean a breath mint.

His policies are helping to attract businesses to our state and get people back to work.

That would be pretty impressive if he hadn't also included this handy chart on his site showing that Florida's unemployment is still considerably worse than the national average.


 Some of the special interests are attacking the Governor for making tough decisions, showing leadership, and doing what he told us he would do. 

Yes, that's exactly what's happening. The "special interests" Are upset about Scott making tough decisions. "Dammit!" they exclaim. "He's showing leadership again! And now he's doing exactly what he promised to do? well, that's the last straw!"

 I'm sure that's what they are upset about. I'm sure it has nothing to do with insignificant trifles like:

Florida Gov. Rick Scott rejects funding for high-speed rail

Gov. Rick Scott, citing concerns over potential cost overruns, rejected $2.4 billion in federal dollars to pay for construction of a high-speed rail line connecting Tampa and Orlando.

Or. . .

Education cuts show up in Rick Scott's budget

Says he never said he would keep education funding the same.


Or. . .

Health care services for women and children among Scott vetoes, crisis pregnancy centers untouched

Gov. Rick Scott yesterday vetoed almost $1.5 million for a handful of community health care clinics in Florida that provide adult and pediatric primary health care services, family planning, immunizations and  STD and HIV screening, among other services, to low-income and minority patients.

Yeah, I'm sure it's that darn showing leadership thing that has folks upset.

 And it goes on. . .
 Rick Scott deserves our unwavering and enthusiastic support.
How can we expect to elect leaders who will keep their word and do what’s right for our state if we don’t stand up for those with the courage to set priorities, make difficult choices, and actually deliver on their promises made? 

We must stand with leaders who will bravely cut education while courageously phasing out all corporate income taxes. Oh, if only more politicians had the courage to stand up for the poor, put-upon corporations!

But that's not even the most pathetic item on Governor Scott's website. He also includes a video praising his "accomplishments." A video featuring His Mom!

Support Rick Scott. His mommy thinks he's a good boy!
Holy cow!

I suddenly have the urge to take his lunch money.

Of course, if you want to see an actually relevant Rick Scott video, there's this: