Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Oh, For the love of God, Will You Please Just Get it Over With!

I swear to God, if I hear one more thing about this fucking royal wedding, I'm going to go mental.


Why is it that whenever this stupid, inbred, useless family does anything, the US press has to go gaga over them?

Maybe the English have some sort of good reason to cherish the royals, I guess they have some sort of significance to them, I haven't spent much time in England, I don't know, but we live in America. America. The country founded on the principle of "Fuck Royalty." We had a war so that we wouldn't have to put up with kings and queens, but every time there's news about the royals, we have to pretend that we give a shit about these people?

They do nothing, you know. They have no power, no responsibilities, no authority and really no accomplishments past perfecting the sideways half-assed dismissive royal wave. Although "perfected" is not exactly right, because nobody did the royal wave better than Sadam Hussein. Say what you want about Sadam, the man could wave. That man expressed more power with a turn of the wrist than, I don't know, someoneelse making some other hand gesture, the point is, Sadam was the master of the royal wave. You saw that wave, and you were ready to pledge your loyalty to that man!

Anyway, I just wish they would have the damn wedding and be done with it, and we can go back to being America again.