Tuesday, February 4, 2014

Crazy Candidate of the Day - You knew it was only a matter of time edition

You had to know it was only a matter of time until she threw  her tricorn tinfoil  hat into one ring or another.

Victoria Jackson Files for County Seat in Tenn.

Look at all these books I've never read!

Former "Saturday Night Live" cast member Victoria Jackson has filed to run as an independent candidate for a seat on a county commission outside Nashville, Tenn.
Jackson, who calls herself a tea party conservative, moved to Thompson Station in Williamson County last year. She told The Tennessean (http://tnne.ws/1n8zPjr) she filed as an independent because she's "very disappointed with the Republican Party."

 Really, Victoria Jackson? Are you really running for office?

Yes! I’m Running for Office! Vote Jackson!
Read more at http://victoriajackson.com/10501/yes-im-running-office-vote-jackson#sypL04QouHXlAW3K.99

Yes! I’m Running for Office! Vote Jackson!

I have just become an “empty nester” so I have time in between acting jobs to get involved.

A ha ha ha ha ha ha!!! "Between acting jobs!" Ahahahahaha!!!!
What are you working on Casual Sex? Part 2?
This is my first time running for office. I want to be an example to other moms, and regular folk to get involved in their local government. It’s the only way we will save America.

And if you're trying to save America, you're probably going to want to wait until the kids are out of the house and you have some spare time "between acting jobs." It's not like saving America is all that urgent or anything.
So what are Ms Jackson's (if you're nasty) policy positions? Well, she's in favor of AMERICA!! WOO HOO!!! And some other kinda crazy shit.
I’m against Common Core

Well, a lot of people are against Common Core. That doesn't sound all that crazy. Of course, the link she provides leads to a story on Wing Nut Daily by despicable harpy Phylis Sclafly entitled Education dictates more like 'Communist Core' So that seems pretty sensible.
I’m against Agenda 21, which is being implemented already at the local level,
No. No it isn't. What exactly going on that you think is implementation of "Agenda 21?"
Agenda 21, which is being implemented already at the local level, in offices like Main St. Franklin where “Franklin Tomorrow” pushes “innocent” policies like bike paths and walking trails, perhaps unaware of the United Nations plot to separate American citizens from their private property, eliminate suburbs, and concentrate people groups into cities, forcing mass transit, eliminating cars under the false-science guise of “human caused” global warming/climate change.

Oh my God! That sounds like something generally shouted through a bullhorn by someone standing on a milk crate on any streetcorner in Los Angeles! Anyone who sees a vast global conspiracy behind the building of a bike path is exactly the sort of person who should hold public office! People who see walking trails as a sign of an impending takeover of a scary globalist agenda are exactly the kind of people who should be put into positions of responsibility!
Our Freedom of Speech is under attack. At the Manchester Muslim Community Outreach Event last year, State Attorney Bill Killian announced to a group of 1,000 that American citizens could be federally prosecuted for saying disparaging remarks against Islam. This is not Freedom of Speech. This is the beginning of the implementation of Shariah Law

Okay, I don't know who Bill Killian is,
 but if he said that, he is either a moron or a liar.
And if you really believed that criticizing Islam was a federal crime, would you really be posting shit like this on your own website?
". . .every civilization Muslims have infiltrated for the last 1400 years, they have annihilated. That’s why they’re bad neighbors.”
They are infiltrating America right now.

Islam is a Satanic cult written 600 years after the Bible. It takes the Word of God and rewrites, distorts it. Mohammed admits that he thought he was demon possessed when he got his first “revelations.” He practiced “black magic.”
That's pretty fucking bold. Aren't you worried that the black helicopters might come and take you away to a FEMA re-education camp?
Our Freedom of Religion is under attack. Pastors who preach the Bible, are being accused of “hate speech” if they agree with God’s view of homosexuality.

Because if someone criticizes the way you express your small-minded, hateful religious views, that's the same thing as attacking your freedom. Oh, excuse me, I meant  
I support fiscal responsibility, personal responsibility, and the Constitution. I’m for less taxes, less regulation, less government. I support small business. I want to keep District 2 rural. I think nature is important. But, something needs to be done about the traffic jam on Main Street/Columbia Pike.

Okay, I'm a little confused. You want to keep District 2 rural, but you don't want regulations? Because anything you, as a county commissioner to keep your district rural would be regulation. When you keep developers from building in your rural district, that's regulation.
Also, you want to keep it rural, but what, build more roads? How are you planning on easing traffic in some way that apparently would be harmful to nature, while keeping things rural but without taxes or regulation?
Well, I'm sure you'll explain all this during the debates!