Thursday, January 23, 2020

Bad Ads -- E*Trade

Don't get mad, Get E*Trade.

So, this is the premise of this ad. There are people out there who have hoarded so much wealth that they've run out of legitimate ways to spend it and are purchasing yachts for their dogs. And we aren't supposed get mad. We're supposed to believe that, like the regular guy in the ad, we can, on a waiter's salary. invest so smartly in the stock market that we too can become fabulously wealthy so that way everyone's happy! Right? I mean, as an hourly wage-earner, there's really no reason you shouldn't be able to save up a little nest egg and then invest all of it in the Wall Street casino and then probably your stocks will double in value, then double again and again until your meager pitiful little life savings becomes a vast fortune. Because that's how it works, right?
Are you poor? Are you living paycheck to paycheck? Are you struggling to make ends meet? Well, whose fault is that? Yours, of course, because youi aren't doing what the smart dog-yacht-owning people are doing and increasing your wealth exponentially with on-line investing. What are you stupid or something? All you have to do is go on line, put in all the extra money you have lying around, pick a stock that is going top be the next Google or the next Amazon or whatever and bingo bango you're rich!

It reminds me of the old Steve Martin bit about how you can be a millionaire and never pay taxes. First - get a million dollars.