Friday, March 7, 2014

Sweet Jeebus, Paul Ryan is Fucking Stupid!

We already knew that Paul Ryan is a terrible, soulless rodent of a human being. We knew he was a person who read Ayn Rand and a: took her seriously, and b: never matured to the point where he could look back and say "man, I can't believe I ever took that shit seriously!"

We knew he was the "numbers guy" whose numbers don't add up. And we knew he was a shameless hypocrite who has spent most of his life receiving money from the government in one way or another while railing against the idea of anyone else getting money from the government.

But I didn't realize he was this fucking stupid!

Paul Ryan: Kids getting free lunches don't have caring parents

Rep. Paul Ryan (R-WI) asserted on Thursday that liberals did not understand that kids who got free lunches at school did not have parents who cared about them at home. 

Well, to be fair, it is true that we don't understand things that are completely and obviously false.

He then told a story of a "young boy from a very poor family" who received free lunches at school "from a government program."
"He didn't want a free lunch," Ryan insisted. "He wanted his own lunch, one in a brown paper bag, just like the other kids."
"He wanted one, he said, because he knew a kid with a brown paper bag had someone who cared for him. This is what the left does not understand."

Okay, let's pretend for a minute that this story was actually true (it isn't).
What's the point of this story?
 What's the lesson here?

If Ryan actually believes that the kid's parents are not packing him a brown-bag lunch because they do not care about him, what does he think will happen if the school doesn't provide the kid with lunch?
This imaginary kid's imaginary parents don't care enough about him to send him to his imaginary school with an imaginary lunch. Do you think that if the school doesn't provide a free lunch, a brown bag is going to magically appear because suddenly this kid's horrible asshole parents will magically start caring about him? His imaginary parents still won't care about him, only now he also gets to go hungry. What problem is this supposed to solve?

Why do people keep pretending to take Paul Ryan seriously?