I could have sworn I was gone less than a week. How is there this much shit to look back on?
All this stuff happened while I was gone?
Yes, that's right. After TV host Jimmy Kimmel went on the air and talked about his infant son's near-death experience and came up with the radical leftist notion that babies shouldn't be allowed to die just because their parents are poor, that was former Congressman and current deadbeat dad Joe Walsh's response.
Naturally, he got a lot of well-deserved shit for that Tweet and, being completely despicable, vile and utterly devoid of human decency, he of course doubled down.
Health care is complicated. Health care is bankrupting America. But instead of thinking thru all of that, we'd rather cry with @jimmykimmel.— Joe Walsh (@WalshFreedom) May 2, 2017
Because if you really want to appeal to today's modern conservative, going after a man whose newborn son is clinging to life in a hospital is really the way to go. That's not even sarcasm, that's actually good advice if you want to follow the Joe Walsh career path.
I'll say it: For a people no longer capable of logic & reason, it's perfect that a late night comedian just decided our health care policy.— Joe Walsh (@WalshFreedom) May 2, 2017
I like @Elise_Jordan, but nobody is ok with dead babies.— Joe Walsh (@WalshFreedom) May 3, 2017
Health care is complicated & it's bankrupting America. https://t.co/zH3c8uNnNX
Except that you clearly are. You can't say "I ain't gonna pay for that baby to stay alive" and then say "I am not okay with dead babies." You can't get $100,000 behind on child support and have to be sued by your ex-wife and then say "No one is okay with deadbeat dads." You. You are okay with them. You are a deadbeat dad. You are someone who is willing to let babies die rather than have any of your tax dollars help save them. You can't have it both ways you loathsome vermin.
Also while I was gone Cheeto Mussolini tried to talk about American history. About which he knows next to nothing. To be fair, he did seem to realize that Andrew Jackson was a person who lived and that the Civil War was a thing that happened. Other than that. . .
President Trump Doesn't Seem To Know Why The Civil War Happened
Here's the transcript:
Okay, but all the transcripts leave out the best part. He begins by talking about how people are supposedly comparing him to Andrew Jackson without realizing that that is NOT a flattering comparison. It's like on an old episode of American Idol when Simon told a kid "that was abysmal" and the kid answers "oh, thank you very much!" and then Simon has to explain to him "no, that's not a compliment." Anyway, he's talking about Andrew Jackson when the interviewer mentions that Jackson's wife had died. Trump says "his wife died? His wife died! They destroyed his wife and she died" as if this reporter wasn't the very person who had just told him this literally 2 seconds ago. He turns it around as if this is something he's telling her! It's so shameless!
And then he talks about "no one asks the question 'why was there a Civil War,'" as if this wasn't discussed in every American history class in every high school, middle school and junior high in America. I will promise you, if you walk into any university with a decent history department, there are entire classes offered in the causes of the Civil War. But in his world, he's the only one who has ever pondered this question!
Also, Andrew Jackson was a lot of things, but no one ever accused him of having a "big heart." He was an enslaver, and he was responsible for the "Trail of Tears" because he was pretty much a psychotically racist piece of shit. But a hell of a swashbuckler, I'll give him that! Oh, and also not alive for the Civil War, but you probably knew that already.
Also, at some point in my absence, it became illegal to laugh?
A Code Pink Protester Laughs Over a Trump Nominee and Is Convicted
A jury on Wednesday convicted three Code Pink activists on charges related to a protest at the confirmation hearing of Jeff Sessions for attorney general — including a Virginia woman who said all she did was break out in laughter.Each of the three protesters faces up to 12 months in jail, $2,000 in fines, or both, depending on the outcome of a June 21 sentencing hearing.
For laughing. Okay, there's got to be more to this story, right?
It was early in the hearing when Senator Richard Shelby, Republican of Alabama, said that Mr. Sessions’s record of “treating all Americans equally under the law is clear and well-documented,” Ariel Gold, the campaign director of Code Pink, said on Wednesday.Ms. Fairooz said that, on hearing that, she let out a giggle.“I just couldn’t hold it,” she said on Wednesday. “It was spontaneous. It was an immediate rejection of what I considered an outright lie or pure ignorance.”She said when officers came over, she expected to be warned or told to shush and was surprised to be taken into custody.
Well, that's her side of the story. I'm guessing maybe the cops have a different version in which she also committed a crime of some sort, right?
Prosecutors described her actions differently.
Aha! I thought so.
Ms. Fairooz had “let out a loud burst of laughter, followed by a second louder burst of laughter,” the U.S. attorney’s office said in the filing.
Um. . . but. . . . but it's still just laughing. That can't possibly be illegal. How long was I gone?
The police then tried to “quietly escort” Ms. Fairooz from the room, but she “grew loud and more disruptive, eventually halting the confirmation hearing,” the court papers argued.
Disruptive? If someone disrupts a hearing, aren't they generally just escorted out? What country is this?
So what was she even convicted of? What could possibly have been illegal in her actions?
Ms. Fairooz was found guilty of the two charges she faced: one of disorderly and disruptive conduct and a charge of parading or demonstrating on Capitol grounds, according to her lawyer, Samuel A. Bogash.Oh, right. I forgot it's illegal to demonstrate on Capitol grounds without dressing like Paul Revere and holding a misspelt sign.
Oh, and this story makes me wonder if maybe we haven't gone backwards in time:
President Donald Trump will reportedly be appointing not one but two vocal abortion opponents to the Department of Health and Human Services.According to Politico, Teresa Manning — a law professor and anti-choice, anti-contraception activist — will be named deputy assistant secretary in the Office of Population Affairs, which delegates Title X funds to family planning initiatives.
Okay, well that;s no surprise. Of course he's going to appoint anti-choice persons to HHS. But this is where it gets baboon-ass crazy:
In a 2003 interview with WBUR Boston, Manning had this to say about contraception in general:
Contraception doesn't work. Its efficacy is very low, especially when you consider over years, which you know a lot of contraception health advocates want — to start women in their adolescent years when they're extremely fertile, incidentally, and continue for 10, 20, 30 years. Over that span of time, the prospect that contraception would always prevent the conception of a child is preposterous.
I can't tell if she actually believes that utter nonsense or if she is just bald-faced lying because she opposes all non-reproductive sex.
I mean, there are studies, right? There have to be. How do you not spend a few minutes in the library, do a Lexis/Nexis search or whatever it's called, and look up a few studies in reputable medical journals? Instead of just saying "contraception preventing pregnancy? Multiple times? Pfft! Unlikely!"
Oh, right. In our new world, the scientific journals have all been set ablaze in a bonfire on which to burn witches. Or women who understand science. Well, same thing, really!
Well, at least one thing hasn't changed. Major newspapers in America are still doing bs stories where they go find some idiotic Trump voters who (surprise, surprise!) still like Trump! NEWS!
“When Joe first told me about Trump, I said no, that guy’s a bragger,” Mr. Paslow said. “Then I started listening to him, and I noticed, he’s a billionaire.
Oh for fuck sake. That's the one thing -- the ONE THING-- that everyone knows about Drimpf. Everyone knows that he allegedly is an alleged billionaire. This was something you "noticed" during the campaign? You "noticed" that he's a billionaire? (allegedly) That's the only goddamm thing he ever talks about!
If somebody comes along and says, ‘President Trump, I want to keep my plant in China and I want to close my plant here, here’s $50 million,’ he says, ‘I don’t need your money, mister.’ ”
Okay, first of all, yes he does. He does need the money, because he's (allegedly) not really a billionaire. That's why he licenses his names to cheap con games like Trump University or various shady land development deals. He's not that rich (allegedly). Second, no one needs to bribe the President to keep their factory in China or close their factory here. There are no laws against either of those things. In fact, our recent spate of "free trade" deals seems to encourage that sort of activity.
Mr. Trump came striding into this bleak landscape and offered them hope. He pledged to the crowd that he would bring back the oil and gas industry the very first day he was in office. “Unbelievably, that is exactly what we wanted to hear!” Mr. Paslow said.
Oh my God! A man running for President came to your town and said exactly what you wanted to hear? Unbelievable! I mean, what are the odds? What are the odds that a candidate would come into Western Pennsylvania and make vague, unkeepable promises to bring back coal jobs? Serendipity!
And they say journalism is dead!