Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Stupid Story of the Day


(via Yahoo News)

Why Black Friday is losing its meaning. In this photo: Shoppers brave Toys 'R' Us during Black Friday (Getty Images/file photo)

Why Black Friday is losing its meaning



Oh, it's so sad.Black Friday has just gotten so commercialized that it's lost it's original meaning. It used to be about  crass, naked acquisitiveness. Now, I just don't know what meaning it has left. Do the younger generation even know what Black Friday is even about?


Goddammit, I hate Black Friday. I mean, I hate that "Black Friday" has become a thing now, not just a bit of retailer jargon, stores now advertise Black Friday sales as if it were an event unto itself, not just a day when most folks are off work and sick of their families and looking for something, anything, to get them out of the house for a few hours so, sure, why not do some early Christmas shopping? Now everyone is supposed to act like the day after Thanksgiving is some sort of actual holiday, or something to look forward to, or something other than the most obnoxious consumer feeding frenzy of the year, and the worst day possible to be a retail employee. Hate it!

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Republicans Begin to Make Overtures to Minority Voters



(Via Think Progress)
Politics

Maine GOP Head Suspects Voter Fraud Because ‘Dozens, Dozens Of Black People’ Voted


 

Okay, that can't really be what he said, right? That headline must be a little misleading. Let's just see what the actual text of the article says:


In some parts of rural Maine, there were dozens, dozens of black people who came in and voted on Election Day. Everybody has a right to vote, but nobody in town knows anyone who’s black. 


 



When Carrigan pressed the party chairman for specifics about where fraud occurred, he vaguely referred to "several rural Maine towns" and promised an investigation to find out more. 

Sounds legit! Fraud almost never occurs in any specific town, usually in some nebulous rural region of unnamed locales.

"What I'm doing is purchasing a post card, we're going to mail it in and thank people for registering to vote and see whether it comes back," [Charlie] Webster said. 
 
You know, Charlie, voter caging is generally done before an election. Much more effective that way.
 
 "So, you think the Democrats bussed in people?" Carrigan asked. 
 
Yes. Yes, I'm sure that's what happened. I'm sure the Democratic leadership risked prosecution and de-legitimization in order to sneak people in to MAINE. They'd go to any lengths to carry MAINE, with it's, what, one and a half electoral votes?  Let the Republicans pull their chicanery in Ohio or Florida, we'll have the last laugh when we carry MAINE!
And what a coup it will be! Why, no Democratic presidential candidate has carried MAINE since, um, 2008.  But before that, no Democrat took Maine since, um , John Kerry way back in '04. . . wait, why are we stealing Maine again?


Of course, the problem is, according to Charlie, that he shouldn't have used the word "black." Because what he meant to say was, um, "black."

“I regret saying the word black because it wasn’t like I was singling out black,” Webster said. “The reason I said it, ‘cause I don’t know where you live, but where I come from in rural Maine, it’s a small percentage of the population. I think we’re the whitest state in the country. So if you go to the polls and see people who are black, it’s unusual. And when you see a lot of people who are black, like six or eight or ten people, you think, ‘Wow, where do they live?’ That was my point.”
 
 
Oh, that's your point! Sure, in a town with only a few black folks in it, I suppose it would be odd to see several black people in the same place at the same time. Unless something important were happening there, like say, a presidential election!
 
 
Webster told TPM he heard from five individuals who were concerned by the number of minority voters casting ballots on Election Day.
“If you live in a town of a few hundred people and you go to the post office every day, if there’s someone who doesn’t look like you, you usually know that,” Webster said. “And that’s why when folks called me and said, ‘Where did this Chinese man come from? We don’t have any Chinese people here. Where did they come from?” Well, I don’t know! It’s a good point.”

  
Oh, never mind. It's just Mickey Rooney!


 You know, I'm beginning to think Charlie Webster might be a bit racist!

Webster said he wasn’t racist and that he had several black friends.
 
 
  

“There’s nothing about me that would be discriminatory. I know black people. I play basketball every Sunday with a black guy. He’s a great friend of mine. Nobody would ever accuse me of suggesting anything,” 
 
No, I'm sure that in your entire life, no one has ever accused you of suggesting anything. But what if we wait just one more sentence?
 
  Nobody would ever accuse me of suggesting anything,” he said. “What I do suggest is. . . 


 


 So, if Maine is any indication, the GOP is making serious progress attracting minority voters. The Democrats might as well close up shop.

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Fun With Victoria Jackson






When I first found out about Victoria Jackson's political ravings, I thought for sure it was some sort of extended joke.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Victoria Jackson is funnier than I remembered.



But the joke is still going on. So maybe she's serious?

After the election, I found out she has a Twitter. I signed up to follow her, thinking it would be funny. Which it kinda is, but mostly just sad.

Because she tweets things like this:


White people (statistically) don't have more children than they can take care of without outside assistance. It's called RESPONSIBILITY.

Wow!

I do give her credit for not prefacing this with the obligatory "I'm not a racist, but. . ." If you're going to be a racist douche, at least own it!


Better to SECEDE than have a civil war. 

Um, secession and civil war are kinda like love and marriage. 
You can't have one without the oooooo-therrrr!!!

Ooh, here's a good one:

Repeal Obamacare. It is killing jobs in this country. Thousands have already lost their jobs because of it. I signed

Yeah, the policies which have yet to take effect are totally killing jobs! Unless you believe like, numbers and stuff.




Very clear chart showing why Socialism/Communism is EVIL

I haven't even looked at the chart yet. I just love the idea of evil being something that can be quantified and expressed in chart form!






And of course, she's huge on secession!


Peacefully grant the State of Minnesota to withdraw from the United States of America & create its own NEW government.

You do know Minnesota's a "blue state," right? 

 

Why would they even want to secede, when the guy they voted for won?

Peacefully grant the State of Tennessee to withdraw from the United States of America & create its own NEW government.





And of course, being a teabagger douchenozzle, she is, shall we say, a fair-weather patriot?


I'm proud to be a Red-State American, but I'm not proud to be an "American." I'm ashamed of 50% of my people.

And which "Red-State" does Ms Jackson call home?

FLORIDA!

 

Why, Florida, what an unusual shade of red you're wearing for the last few elections!

Today, she tweeted a link to an article she wrote for her asinine website:



I Have No Money by Victoria Jackson
The website that makes the totally-not-silly claim that environmentalism is a tool of the Anti-Christ/UN/One World Government cabal to destroy all that is good or something. That is the source of this particular "Fact!"

Anyways, it goes on and on, and I'm just too tired to keep reading, but you get the idea. I really really can't believe that there is any way Victoria Jackson is serious about any of this. I would never have guessed that she was this good a comedian, but I can't believe that she could possibly be this crazy and stupid and still function.


CrazyladyWM

Monday, November 12, 2012

Here are some phrases I could go the rest of my life without seeing or hearing again.

1. "Baby Bump"



I don't know why, there's just something creepy about this expression.
Plus it displays the emotional maturity of "look mommy, that lady has a baby in her tummy!"

2. "Man Cave"



I don't know what bothers me more. The idea that there are certain things, like sports, that are "man things," or that men who enjoy stereotypically male things should proudly consider themselves troglodytes.


 The missus and I enjoy watching sports together. I would venture to think that we're fairly typical that way. We both enjoy bar-games like pool or foozball about the same. So why would I want a room that's a "no girlz allowed" "man-cave?"


3. "Pardon Our Progress."



When a business is remodeling, they used to put up signs saying "pardon our dust" or "pardon our appearance" or whatever which was followed by "we're remodeling to better serve you," or whatever.
Suddenly, someone came up with the idea to switch to the snide, sarcastic "pardon our progress." Why would a business want to go with the message "Oh, excuuuuuse us for wanting to make some progress! I know a Luddite like you might find this hard to understand, but this is what's called an improvement! Um, you're welcome!"

I know there are others, but off the top of my head, these are the three that irk me most.
Any others that bug you? Leave them in the comments!