Monday, May 13, 2013

Maybe Take a Look at Urban Dictionary?


In an article on baseball pitchers by "Yahoo Expert" Jeff Passan, the following sentence appears:


Jeff Passan

8. Matt Cain, who loves the ability to double-fist World Series rings and can't seem to explain how over an impressive career he has managed to average about 11 victories a season.


Yes, Matt Cain loooooves to double-fist his rings.

Jeezus, Jeff, maybe Google new phrases before you use them? Because "double-fisting," that's a thing. And believe me, it has nothing to do with baseball.

Friday, May 3, 2013

Going out of town for a few days

More like a week.

Probably won't be posting anything, but I will be on the Twitter, https://twitter.com/akaProfessorCha

See ya next week.

Thursday, May 2, 2013

What the hell is up with New Hampshire?


http://wwp.greenwichmeantime.com/images/usa/new-hampshire.jpg 

Basically Arizona North

First you got State Rep. Edmond Gionet asking about the possibility of armed insurrection. Now this:

New Hampshire Legislator Claims Boston Bombing Was An Inside Job Because Victim Looked Calm



NH State Rep. Stella Tremblay (R)


Several days after suggesting the Boston Bombing was perpetrated by the U.S. government, New Hampshire State Rep. Stella Tremblay (R-NH) doubled down on the claim Tuesday. In an interview on the radio show of anti-government conspiracy theorist Pete Santilli, Tremblay opined that since photos of a victim who lost his legs did not appear to show him “in shock” or “screaming in agony,” the attack must have been staged. 

Jeezus Christ! Where does she get this shit, Alex Jones?

Citing Alex Jones and his conspiracy theory site Infowars, Tremblay notes that while she once believed 9/11 was a real attack by terrorists, 9/11 “truthers” have opened her eyes. 

Of course. Of course you'd cite Alex Jones. Why the fuck wouldn't you? If you're someone who has been elected to a position of responsibility, why wouldn't you conduct research by logging on to Info Fucking Wars?

http://cdn.ebaumsworld.com/picture/lolkat/lolcatsdotcomiy0hwr7nqv87ch3g.jpg

Of course, this is the state that sent Kelly Ayotte to the Senate. Wonder what she's up to lately. . .

GOP Senator: I Voted Against Equal Pay For Women Because We Have Enough Laws


Well, how about you cancel the law against marijuana to make room for the Equal Pay Act? Since there's some sort of limit to the amount of laws we can have?


Maybe if we let Ayotte explain it, and could she maybe do it in a shambling, incoherent way?


AYOTTE: We have existing laws — Title VII, um, Lilly Ledbetter, all those existing protections in place — that, I believe, enforce and provide that people doing equal jobs are, certainly in this country, should receive equal pay. So, uh, that bill, in my view, didn’t add — in fact I think it created a lot of additional burdens that would have been hard, um, to make it more difficult for job creators to create jobs. . . . The reason that I voted against that specific bill is that, I looked at it, and there were already existing laws that need to be enforced and can be enforced and I didn’t feel like adding that layer was going to help us better get at the equal pay issue.
 Oh, well if it would make it hard to make it difficult to create jobs. . . because, I guess it's easier to create jobs if you have one of those simple 77 cents-to-one dollar male-to-female pay ratios? Because paying men and women the same is too confusing? I don't know, apparently this sort of thing makes sense in New Hampshire.



Wednesday, May 1, 2013

How did we get to this point?


How did we get to the point where the clearly deranged are chosen for positions of responsibility and leadership?
Take for example, New Hampshire State Rep. Edmond Gionet (R-obviously), who asked this question of Senator Kelly Ayotte:

Now is there anything in Washington that says — any telltale signs that maybe we might be headed for an internal revolution given the fact that these kinds of things are going on? 

Um, what? An internal revolution? How insane would you have to be to think that there might be an "internal revolution" against the government of the most powerful nation in the history of the world?Who would think that there might be telltale signs in Washington that some cabal of disgruntled rednecks might be about to take up arms against the most powerful military might the world has ever seen? Well, to be fair, that's not the complete quottation, maybe it makes more sense in context. Let me see. . .

GIONET: One of the things that concerns my constituents — the majority of my constituents –- is the appointments that are now being made in Washington by our President and the way he is handling the illegal immigrants, nationalizing them and giving them the opportunity to vote, and wanting to keep track of our guns. They are worried that they are going to have to use these guns because of our own government. Now is there anything in Washington that says — any telltale signs that maybe we might be headed for an internal revolution given the fact that these kinds of things are going on? This is what’s said in the groups that I sit in. 


http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/3/3b/Paris_Tuileries_Garden_Facepalm_statue.jpg/300px-Paris_Tuileries_Garden_Facepalm_statue.jpg

Nope.

Wow, where to start? First of all, "nationalizing" immigrants? So you think that all immigrants are now owned collectively by the people of the United States? Also, no one is letting them vote. And no one is trying to keep track of your guns. They should be. If this were a sane country, there would be a National registry of guns, but this is America, so of course there isn't.

http://brokelyn.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/rick-perry-329x440.jpg 
Whoo! 'Murca!

 And if you are meeting with constituents who are talking about using their guns against the US government, seems like you have a duty to report them to the FBI or the ATF or somebody, because these people can not be trusted with firearms.

And who are these "groups you sit in?" Do any of them rhyme with "Sean Smurch?" 

ThinkProgress caught up with Gionet outside the event and asked him to clarify his deranged rant.


He explained: “This morning, I was down at the Lions Club, at McDonald’s and this [photo of President Obama with Sec. of Transportation-Designate Anthony Foxx] was given to me. And they’re saying all the key positions… That’s the latest one. But even key positions within the White House are going to people that are going to promote his agenda. And this agenda doesn’t appear to be helping us to the extent that it should be. It might be that we’ve got the wrong slant on things, but here again we’re in our own world up here. We understand what we like, the lifestyles that we’ve had, the way the country should be run. And it’s just not happening.”

Wait. Are you saying that the President is nominating people who share his point of view on the issues? Because that's a pretty serious accusation, buster, you'd better have some proof to back that up! 

http://thinkprogress.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/booze.jpg 
I'm guessing about 80 proof!

And if you're saying that the president's agenda isn't helping people as much as it oughta be, that's a perfectly good reason to vote for someone else. Or take up arms against the US government,  whichever seems more reasonable.

And you know, it'd be one thing if it was just some little local nobody like Gionet,
State Rep. Edmond Gionet (R-NH) 
(seen here losing an argument to a horse)
but of course it's not.  

Just look no farther than Texas. The state that sent Louie Gohmert to Congress:


http://clipart.toonarific.com/data/media/110/fud004.gif

Gohmert, when not protecting Texas from Sharia Law and wascally wabbits, takes time out of his busy day to apparently actually believe that the Obama Administration is full of members of the Muslim Brotherhood.

GOHMERT: I think it is… It’s very clear to everybody but this administration that radical Islam is at war agains us… Radical Islam is at war with us. Thank God for the moderates that don’t approve of what’s being done. But this administration has so many Muslim Brotherhood members that have influence that they just are making wrong decisions for America.


Also, he apparently truly believes that Muslim terrorists are going to disguise themselves as Mexicans  and cross the Rio Grande in order to come in and do terrorist stuff.

“We know al Qaeda has camps over with the drug cartels on the other side of the Mexican border,” the Republican from Tyler said on C-SPAN Wednesday morning. “We know that people that are now being trained to come in and act like Hispanic when they are radical Islamists. We know these things are happening.

http://www.topsecretwriters.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/terrorist.jpg  
Allahu Akba- - I mean Madre de Dios!

 You know, it's one thing to say that theoretically, the terrorists could put on Dodger caps and shave their beards and try to sneak in disguised as Alberto Queda, but to say "we know these things are ahppening" is a pretty good indication that you are looney.

Looney Tunes - Elmer Fudd no7878 

So how does someone like Louie Gohmert get sent to Congress? Hell, this is a state that sent Ted Cruz to the Senate.

Ted Cruz is the guy who claims that Harvard Law had more Communists bent on overthrowing the US than it did Republicans.  Ted Cruz who has this on his website:

Agenda 21 attempts to abolish “unsustainable” environments, including golf courses, grazing pastures, and paved roads. It hopes to leave mother earth’s surface unscratched by mankind. Everyone wants clean water and clean air, but Agenda 21 dehumanizes individuals by removing the very thing that has defined Americans since the beginning—our freedom.

Yes, Agenda 21, a  non-binding set of suggestions that the UN came up with in the 1990's would eliminate paved roads. Yes, that's exactly what would happen. And what evil mastermind could have come up with the fiendish scheme to unpave all the roads? I'll give you three guesses. . .aw, hell it was Soros. Of course, you probably knew that.

The originator of this grand scheme is George Soros, who candidly supports socialism and believes that global development must progress through eliminating national sovereignty and private property.

Yes, because if there's one thing your average billionaire hates, it's the idea of private property. 

And if you want to really see just how delusional Ted Cruz really is, take a look at this headline:

 
Cruz 2016
The freshman senator is considering a run for president.

This goes beyond the normal sort of "how the hell can a guy who called hurricane relief for New Jersey 'pork' then demanded aid for Texas possibly hope to win" kind of delusional. Because Ted Cruz was born in Calgary.
Calgary, Alberta.
Calgary, Alberta, CANADA.
Which means he is Constitutionally prohibited from serving as President. Even if he had a snowball's chance of winning, he would not be allowed to take office.

Cruz isn’t worried that his birth certificate will be a problem. Though he was born in Canada, he and his advisers are confident that they could win any legal battle over his eligibility. Cruz’s mother was a U.S. citizen when he was born, and he considers himself to be a natural-born citizen.


 Oh, well, if he considers himself a natural born citizen, I guess that's all that really matters. I think the Constitution says that the President must be a natural born citizen or consider himself so to be. I'm sure that will be good enough for Orly Taitz (sadly, it probably would be.)


These sort of people used to be relegated to standing on milk crates, shouting at passersby through a bullhorn. How did we get to the point where nuts like these are in positions of responsibility?
 

http://www.varley.net/Pages/VarleyYarns/2%20Down%20a%20lazy%20concrete%20river/Down%20LA%20River%20Images/Street%20corner%20preacher%20with%20family%20-%20Down%20LA%20River%2011.jpg
 Ladies and gentlemen, the next President of the United States. . .


Monday, April 29, 2013

Sarah Palin Kinda Sorta Gets Something Half-Right






Kinda.
 


And the press just yucked it up along with him, no one had the common decency to even get up and walk out on this obscenity. That's why the WHCD is pathetic, not because the reporters and/or politicians are taking an evening off.

Also, "working our asses off?" OUR asses? You don't have a job, you nitwit. What is it you do all day? Is it hard work having another book ghostwritten for you? Or having one of your minions update your Facebook page with more bullshit? You quit the last actual job you had halfway through, you don't get to complain about other people not working hard enough.