Thursday, May 31, 2018

Random Thoughts

Random thought # 1:

It must have been nice for Kim Kardashian to finally be the smart one in the room.

 

 Although I expect she must have been a bit disappointed when, after talking to President McCheese about prison reform, he said "you know, you're right. I should pardon Dinesh D'Souza!"

At this point, my advice to anyone who is in jail and wants to get out, just tweet a picture of yourself in a MAGA hat to Il Douche. Maybe with a racist caption. Say you've been set up by the "deep state."





Random thought #2:

Do you think service dogs just think most people are dicks? Like wherever they go, they see other dogs getting petted and having their ears scratched by strangers, but those same people walk up to the service dogs, stop short and then just walk on by. The dog doesn't know what's written on his vest. So he has no way of knowing why people are petting all the other digs but not him. Does he think maybe he's not a good boy? Because really, he's the best boy. I really worry about their self-esteem.

A shot of the front half of Sid's body, coincidentally with my legs in jeans also in frame. Sid is wearing a dark green vest with a soft raised handle. A patch on the side of the vest says Working Dog Do Not Pet, patches on the top say Service Dog In Training. There is another working dog patch on the other side which you can't see. Also he has a really, really cool collar with flames and skulls.


Oh - and by the way, Google Images, this \/
                                                                 

pechera de cuero perro pitbull boxer rottweiler pretal

. . . is NOT a service dog. This is a dog that is "into leather."


Random thought #3:

I bet there's good money in writing songs for children that are a little educational. It's probably a crowded marketplace, but I thought I'd give it a shot.

Ready? One Two Three Four. . .




I like ice cream


What do you get when it's time for a bath
And you jump in the tub and you make a big splash?
Water on the floor 'cuz the tub was too full
That's Archimedes' Principle!

Remember, kids:

If you want to calculate bouyancy,
In your glass of milk
Or in the Caspian Sea,
There's a simple way that you might intuit.
You just need the weight of the displaced fluid!

The bouyant force on a submerged body
Either in the sink, the tub or the potty,
 Is equal to the weight of the fluid displaced,
If it's water or juice or tomato paste.

It's a work in progress.

Here's another one I just thought of. It's about where babies come from.

File:Helpful Bear.jpg

And a one and a two and a... .

Oh, kittens and puppies
And fuzzy little ducklings.
All kinds of babies
Are made by

Anyway, you get the idea.

And yes, this is the sort of thing I think about while I'm at work.




7 comments:

Infidel753 said...

Heh> I'm sure Archimedes would approve. Good to see you're getting in some creative time at work. Most jobs are pure dead time.

Kardashian was actually trying to get Trump to pardon another prisoner. She should just have hinted that that prisoner had incriminating info about Hillary's e-mails.

anne marie in philly said...

hee hee hee on the kids songs!

I would have LOVED to have been a fly on the wall yesterday in the oval office listening to 2 airheads. not a brain cell between them.

a dog into leather - who would have thought?

Debra She Who Seeks said...

All three of your random thoughts are winners! And your first line in Random Thought #1 made me pee my pants LOL!

Professor Chaos said...

Send me the cleaning bill.


Bob said...

Two big asses in the Oval!

Leather Daddy Dog!

I want the Songbook!

Abu Scooter said...

I don't want to know what Google thinks that leather-harnessed dog is servicing.

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