Beware of Turkeys!!!

 

1. Sacrificed to Allah? Do Muslims even do animal sacrifice?  And if they do, would they really say "this turkey I sacrifice to you, oh great Allah. J/K, LOL! we're going to sell it to an infidel for Thanksgiving!

Gotcha, Allah!

2. How do you think that turkeys are normally killed? You don't think their tracheas and aortas are severed? You think they have some sort of humane lethal injection process or something?

3. Do you really think that Butterball employees are taking the time to recite an Islamic prayer every time they slaughter a turkey? You think Butterball turkeys aren't raised on factory farms and slaughtered on an assembly line? Do you have any idea what modern turkey farming looks like?

  

(hint: Not like this so much)

4. What if they really were? What if the Butterball people really were following halal butchering practices? How would that affect the eaters of the turkey? Wouldn't the cooking process kill any Muslim cooties that were in the bird?

 

I once ate a bagel, and look at me now!

--Chin Ho Pak

Why?

Welcome back the 'First Family of Fright'

America's first family of horror is back! According to announcements made by NBC execs and Deadline Hollywood, The Munsters are coming back to primetime TV.

Dear God, why?

Who wants to see this? Who has been clamoring for a re-make of the Munsters? You know the original series only lasted TWO YEARS!
And the only remotely enjoyable facet of the show died in 2006.

 

Probably still the best part of the new version

45-years later, NBC and writer Bryan Fuller are ready to overhaul the characters and concept by envisioning the half-hour, black and white sitcom as an hour-long drama 

An hour-long drama? An hour-long Drama? if anyone is at all interested in seeing a re-make of the Munsters, wouldn't be because they enjoyed the original half-hour sitcom?

 

If only this had been darker and edgier!

As is the trend, Fuller’s version is said to be a darker, edgier take on more lighthearted nature of the original series. This new vision for The Munsters will work within the confines of the same premise, despite an apparent shift in tone and with some tweaks to the characters and their origins.

Hey, great idea! Or you could just, I don't know, come up with an original idea? Seeing as how you're in  a business that's supposed to be "creative"?

Is there anything left to be re-made?

Woody Woodpecker Movie in Development at Universal, Illumination

Oh, come on!

Illumination Entertainment, the Universal-based animation house behind Despicable Me and next year’s Dr. Seuss’ The Lorax, is working on a feature project centering on the crimson-coifed cartoon character. John Altschuler and Dave Krinsky, who co-wrote the Will Ferrell comedy Blades of Glory, are in talks to develop a story.

So you couldn't make a movie with Will Ferrell, Will Arnett, Amy Poehler and Craig T. Nelson funny, and you're going to do the new Woody Woodpecker? Good luck with that!

Illumination and the writers will seek to create a story that modernizes the character, hopefully launching a franchise in the process.

Modernizing the character? What does that mean exactly? Because I have a sneaking suspicion that it's going to look something like this:

 

Really?

(via the Daily What)



You really think you can capitalize on this?
I don't know whether to feel disgust or pity.

Bad Ads -- Capital One

The first problem with this ad is that it features Jimmy Fallon.




Pop quiz - when was the last time Jimmy Fallon was funny?

Trick question, he was never funny.

Seriously, is there any celebrity more annoying than Jimmy Fallon? How is this the guy you want representing your product? What, was Snookie unavailable? Jack Black have a prior commitment?  Jimmy Fallon? Ugh!

Then, there's a joke. It's not what you would call a "funny" joke, necessarily, but by credit card commercial standards, it's not terrible. "If you don't want the extra money, send it to me." Okay, that's not going to win any prizes, but it's fine. If you just leave it there. But no. No, Fallon has to beat it into the ground. And then, he has this kinda racist sounding line "I'll make it rain up in hyah!"
Seriously, listen to the ad and tell me it doesn't make you uncomfortable.



It's one thing to say "make it rain." It's an expression that began with the hip-hop set, but it's not like white people don't use the phrase too. That's fine, but "up in here?" That's starting to sound a little sketchy, and pronouncing the word "here" as "hyah" or "hyar" or whatever, that's straying into Amos & Andy territory.

Why would you have him say that? Even if you had no racist intentions, how do you not hear that and say "Hey, Jimmy, just say 'I'll make it rain.' Don't try to sound like Def Comedy Jam.."

Am I wrong?

Even if I am totally off-base on the racial thing, there's still no excuse for subjecting us to Jimmy Fallon.

There is a right way and a wrong way to pet the bunny.

This is the wrong way.