Debate Observation # 14

Government does not create jobs! Except the one I'm running for.

Repeating "government does not create jobs" like a mantra doesn't make it any more true. Government creates jobs for soldiers, sailors, marines, airmen, cops, firefighters, teachers, park rangers, sewage treatment plant employees, CDC researchers, FBI investigators, CIA spies, meat inspectors, mail carriers, bridge builders, air traffic controllers, road pavers, drivers test examiners, astronauts, airplane builders, bomb manufacturers, uniform sewers, but  I guess those don't really count?

Debate Observation # 13

I'm sorry, did Mr. Free Trade just promise to implement tariffs against China?

You know what would be even more effective than tariffs? Call your friends at Bain and tell them to stop sending jobs to China.

Debate Observation # 12

The President wants to keep AK-47's out of the hands of criminals and the mentally ill.

In other words:

AAAIIIEEE!!! JACKBOOTED GOVERNMENT GOONS ARE COMING FOR YOUR GUNS!!! WAKE UP, PEOPLE!!!!

Debate Observation # 11

Why does Candy Crowley keep telling the candidates "don't go away?" Is there some possibility that one of them might wander off?

Also, if you're moderating a presidential debate (and doing so quite well) shouldn't it be Candace Crowley? You're a journalist, not a stripper.

Debate Observation # 10

God, Mitt is so proud of himself for pronouncing "Lorraine" correctly. After asking her to repeat it three times. Fuck, it's Lorraine, not Krzyzewski!