Least Self-Aware Person in the World

Guess who posted this?

“Lazy hands make a man poor, but diligent hands bring wealth.” Proverbs 10:4 

I came across this Scripture and wanted to pass it along.  I love it because it reminds me of my parents and the work ethic they instilled in all of us kids. If you want something, you go out and work for it.
No one owes you anything, and I’m embarrassed to be in a generation that doesn’t have that mindset.
Honest, hard work, is the only way to do it right. Don’t rely on anyone to provide for you.
The world doesn’t owe you anything!


Can you guess? Can you guess which advocate for the work ethic posted this?

  

Yep, Bristol Palin!

Bristol Palin, who I'm pretty sure has never done an honest day's work in her life, posted this scolding of America's youth for not being hard-working enough.

Irony is dead.

Roll this sentence around in your noggin for a second:

 I love it because it reminds me of my parents and the work ethic they instilled in all of us kids.

Really. Your parents?  YOUR parents?

Okay, I don't know much about your dad, but your mom instilled a work ethic in you? When was that? Was it while she was pissing off the McCain team by refusing to do the debate prep or do her homework before interviews, or learn anything?

Maybe it was when she quit her job halfway through for reasons that she never could make entirely clear.

Or maybe when she had FOX build a studio in her house so she could toss her word-salads without even having to drive down to the local affiliate.

And whatever work ethic your parents instilled in you, I'm not sure it really took. Because when have you ever done anything that could be described as "work?"

No one owes you anything, and I’m embarrassed to be in a generation that doesn’t have that mindset.

Honest, hard work, is the only way to do it right. Don’t rely on anyone to provide for you.

Yeah, honest, hard work! It's just disgusting how many of today's young people will just sit around expecting to be given reality TV shows just because they're related to someone famous!

Or how many kids just expect to be paid money to promote abstinence just because they're unwed teenage mothers!

Or how these darn kids today just think that they should be handed book deals just because their mothers give Bill Kristol a chubby.

 



Irony is dead and Bristol Palin just pissed on its corpse.


New FCC Rule

There must be at least one Palin on TV at all times.

L to R: Todd,  Nutterbutter, Bristol, Thumbtack, Other Bristol.

Bristol Palin Says Reality Show Will Present Her as a 'Grounded, Normal Mom'

Because what is more normal than being followed around by TV cameras all day?

And what could be more "grounded" than the idea that you deserve to be treated as a celebrity without having accomplished a damn thing?

Palin will star in her own reality TV show. "Bristol Palin: Life's a Tripp," will feature 10 half-hour episodes that will air on the Lifetime network starting June 19.
 
Palin, 21, sat down recently with "Good Morning America" anchor Robin Roberts to talk about the show.
 
Asked what it was to have cameras watching her every move, every hour of every day, she replied: "I don't really think you get used to all of it but Tripp was used to it the whole time.

But then, he's a lot more mature and intelligent than I am!

Roberts also asked Palin how her mother felt about her doing the series.
 
"You know, she supports me and she knows that I have good judgment so she is definitely in support of it," Palin replied.

Um, at what point have you demonstrated "good judgement?"
I think your mother saw an opportunity for you to get a bunch of money without doing anything and said "hell, yeah. You should jump on that scam right away!"

And the young woman's strong support of her mother is clearly demonstrated in the show, when she engages in a heated verbal exchange at a bull-riding bar with a man whose political views are different from those of her famous mother.
 
"I think if somebody is going to talk poorly about my mom, I am going to pick and choose my battles and a battle like that, I chose to confront him and see what the real problem was," she said,

Aww, she's already talking gibberish! Sarah must be so proud!

 

Proudly as a peacock of where I would! 

Mama Grizzly!

"and I'm excited for viewers to see the real me in that, because I'm sitting there all tough and shaking and I'm acting tough and instantly when it's over, it's like, 'OK, there's the real Bristol,' because I am calling my boyfriend, I'm calling my mom. 'Ah, get me out of here,' people are going to see the real Bristol in this show."

So even Bristol doesn't know who the real Bristol is? You see the "real Bristol" when she's "sitting there all tough," but then the real Bristol is calling her mom and her boyfriend? The real Bristol says "ah, get me out of here?" I don't get it.

She added that the real Bristol Palin is "a grounded, normal mom."

Ah, that's the real Bristol. Just a normal, grounded mom picking fights in redneck bars from 1981, I guess, because who still has bull-riding in a bar these days?

But sometimes, one Palin is not enough.

TV: Todd Palin to be on ‘Stars Earn Stripes’

Yes, Todd. The quiet Palin. The Kourtney to Sarah's Kris and Bristol's Khloe.

They're the Kardashians of right-wing politics would be the main take-away from that joke.

By Lisa De Moraes, Tuesday, June 19, 7:43 PM

Sarah Palin’s husband, Todd, is among those competing in NBC’s new reality series “Stars Earn Stripes,” the network revealed Tuesday.

This is not entirely surprising, given that “SES” exec producer Mark Burnett also exec-produced Sarah’s TLC reality series “Sarah Palin’s Alaska.” And late last year, word around Hollywood was that Sarah and Burnett were pitching a reality series about Todd’s career as a championship snowmobile racer. Apparently, there were no takers.

No takers? Who wouldn't want to watch a show about a creepy secessionist trying to escape his atrocious wife's enormous shadow by riding around in a snowmobile and referring to it constantly as a "snow machine" even though a snow machine is something entirely different, a machine which makes artificial snow for ski resorts? I know I'd watch that. Under certain circumstances.

 

Yeah, that would do it.

 Each week on “Stars Earn Stripes,” the competitors, teamed with members of the military or law enforcement, will attempt to complete “missions” inspired by military exercises. The winnings will be donated to first-responder and veterans groups. Todd, for example, is playing for Armed Services YMCA Alaska, NBC said.

Wow! I'm pretty sure that's the first time a Palin has ever done anything to benefit anyone else. I mean, I'm sure he's getting paid to be on the show, and he is helping feed the family fame-addiction, but still. Armed Services YMCA sounds like a good cause. Not good enough to forgive the upcoming "Real Housewives of Wasilla" show, but still. Pretty nice.

Gee, Bristol Palin's Kind of an Asshole!

I guess the nut doesn't fall far from the tree?

Hail to the Chiefs – Malia and Sasha Obama
May 10, 2012 By Bristol Palin

Is anyone really surprised by the fact that President Obama came out of the closet for gay marriage?

Well, I am. I can't remember the last time he had the balls to take a potentially controversial stand on anything.

What was most surprising is when he explained how his position (supposedly) “evolved,” by talking to his wife and daughters:

"Supposedly" because obviously nothing has ever evolved. Duh!

“It’s interesting, some of this is also generational,” the president continued. “You know when I go to college campuses, sometimes I talk to college Republicans who think that I have terrible policies on the economy, on foreign policy, but are very clear that when it comes to same-sex equality or, you know, sexual orientation, that they believe in equality. They are much more comfortable with it. You know, Malia and Sasha, they have friends whose parents are same-sex couples. There have been times where Michelle and I have been sitting around the dinner table and we’re talking about their friends and their parents and Malia and Sasha, it wouldn’t dawn on them that somehow their friends’ parents would be treated differently. It doesn’t make sense to them and, frankly, that’s the kind of thing that prompts a change in perspective.”

Um-hum, and let's see how you can spin a nice family discussion about treating people decently into something horrible. . .

Let’s pause for just one second. When Christian women run for high office, people inevitably bring up the question of submission. Once, Michele Bachmann, for example, was asked during a debate, “As president, would you be submissive to your husband?”

Once/inevitably, tomato/tomahto!

Ms Bachmann was asked that question because she has expressed those kind of trogolodyte fundamentalist views before, not for whatever insidious fake reason you're going to assume.

People automatically assume that a Christian female President isn’t capable of making decisions without her spouse’s stamp of approval.  (I should add female Republican candidates –liberal women don’t get the same kind of questions.)

 

Goddamm right we don't, bitch!

Maybe because people know that liberal women are unlikely to espouse such ridiculous beliefs?

So are all those reporters who feared excessive family intervention in the White House all up in arms over the President’s announcement yesterday?  Um.  Not quite.

Because it's totally the same thing, a president listening to his family's point of view and a president having to get her decisions approved by a self-loathing closet queen. Yeah, totally the same.

 So let me get this straight – it’s a problem if my mom listened too much to my dad, but it’s a heroic act if the President made a massive change in a policy position that could affect the entire nation after consulting with his teenage daughters?

Jeezus! How did you work your mom  into this? You do know Michele Bachmann is not your mom, right? I know other people get them mixed up, but you. . .

 

See, the stupid, empty-headed one is. . . no, that's not helpful.

Um, the batshit crazy one. . . oh, never mind.

.
And no one ever said that the problem with your mom was that she listened to your dad. She's got 99 problems, but your dad ain't one. No one ever accused your mother of listening to anyone except the voices in her head.

While it’s great to listen to your kids’ ideas, there’s also a time when dads simply need to be dads.
LEVI!!!

In this case, it would’ve been helpful for him to explain to Malia and Sasha that while her friends parents are no doubt lovely people, that’s not a reason to change thousands of years of thinking about marriage.

Yes, we must continue to think about things the way our anestors did thousands of years ago, That's why w must throw virgins into volcanoes to kep them from erupting, and consult the goat entrails before going into battle.

Or that – as great as her friends may be – we know that in general kids do better growing up in a mother/father home.  Ideally, fathers help shape their kids’ worldview.

         LEVI!!!

 In this situation, it was the other way around.  I guess we can be glad that Malia and Sasha aren’t younger, or perhaps today’s press conference might have been about appointing Dora the Explorer as Attorney General because of her success in stopping Swiper the Fox.

Yes, because the actual living, breathing, human parents of their friends are exactly the same as a cartoon character.

Sometimes dads should lead their family in the right ways of thinking.  In this case, it would’ve been nice if the President would’ve been an actual leader and helped shape their thoughts instead of merely reflecting what many teenagers think after one too many episodes of Glee.

I'm sorry, how many episodes of Glee does it take to give someone the idea that gay people are, um, people? People who should have at least the same rights as an ignorant hillbilly hatemonger whose sole accomplishment was figuring out a way to make money off of getting knocked up by a human meth PSA?

 

Not Even Once.

Sarah Palin Buys a Home in Hell's Waiting Room

Scottsdale, Arizona. A place where the damned congregate to acclimate themselves to the brutal heat and desolation which they will be facing for the next eternity.

Now Sarah Palin has purchased a home walled compound in this barren wasteland.

Seriously. This is it.

For some reason, people are taking this as a sign that she is seriously going to run for president. I can't see it. She wasn't willing to put in the work to be a halfway-decent vice-presidential candidate, I can't see her doing the exhausting work of a presidential campaign. Also, I can't really picture her giving speeches for which she is not paid.

So why would she purchase a $1.6 million home in Arizona, of all places?

 

Here are a few possibilities I thought of:

# 1: She bought a $1.6 million dollar walled-in compound to get away from all those darned elitists.

      'Cuz she's jes' plain folks!

#  2: Living in a walled-in compound in the middle of a god-forsaken desert is a great way to meet some of    those hot Navy Seals. (Reason #1 for Todd Palin)

 

# 3: Needs concrete walls to feel safe from Katie Couric.

# 4:Because it's all about Alaska. And Family. And America. But mostly her love for Alaska. And it's sad that you just don't get that.

# 5:  Because the Constitution, the Founding Fathers, God, America, Reagan.

# 6: Lots of room for free-range Mama Grizzlies.

# 7: To be closer to Bristol, because someone's gotta lug Trig around when the cameras are off!

# 8: Because living in Alaska was one more thing she could quit.

# 9: Going to live in all 50 states alphabetically.

# 10: Alaska no longer insane enough.

 

Bristol Palin has already learned to speak Republican.

Bristol Palin: 'It's not plastic surgery!' it's 'corrective jaw surgery'





Riiiiiiight!
Obviously, this was medically necessary surgery.

Also, so was this:



Apparently, the Palin family is just congenitally unable to tell the truth.

Or maybe Bristol has been studying with Frank Luntz. Having your chin and cheekbones reshaped is "corrective jaw surgery," just like the estate tax is the "death tax." Just like allowing more air pollution is the "clear skies" initiative. Just like allowing more clear-cutting is the "healthy forests" initiative.

This is just how they talk. They absolutely refuse to have an honest discussion.

Bristol Palin admits her recent change in appearance was due to a procedure — but not plastic surgery.





The 20-year-old daughter of 2008 GOP vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin tells Us Weekly that she underwent corrective jaw surgery in December, a month after she finished third on ABC's "Dancing with the Stars." Her face now appears thinner, with higher cheekbones and an angular jaw.




The new look, complete with Palin losing 5 pounds, was unveiled April 30 at the White House Correspondents' Association dinner in Washington, D.C.




"Yes, it improved the way I look, but this surgery was necessary for medical reasons," she told the magazine for its May 23 issue, which will be on newsstands Friday.




Palin said she had the procedure so her jaw and teeth could properly realign.

Yes, yeas she does expect you to believe that. Sure, my cheekbones look more defined, after all I lost FIVE POUNDS! And everyone's chin looks thinner after oral surgery! Why not just say "I had a bunch of money from Dancing With The Stars and from my ridiculous abstinence speeches, so I decided to have a little work done." Who would hold that against her? If she didn't like the way she looks and has the money to change it, more power to her! Why lie?
 
Here's my theory. I once saw an interview with Rosanne in which she said that she had cosmetic surgery because she didn't like to look in the mirror and see the face of her abusive father. I think Bristol couldn't stand looking in the mirror and seeing Sarah the Quitter, but she's scared enough of sarah to not want to admit this publicly, so she made uo this whole "corrective jaw surgery" story knowing that her mom is dumb enough to believe it.

Oh, she may well have actually had this jaw realignment, but I'm guessing that she told the doctor, "hey, as long as you got me under, how about fixing these cheekbones and chin?"

Bristol Speaks - Or Does She?

Treasury funds Bristol Palin to speak on campus

Updated: January 28, 2011 at 1:50 am | Michael Tabb News Editor

 

Bristol Palin has been selected as keynote speaker for this year’s Sexual Responsibility Week at Washington University.

 

 

Sexual Responsibility! Bristol Palin! Hahahahahahaha!!! 

 Student Union Treasury on Tuesday approved a $20,000 appeal by the Student Health Advisory Committee (SHAC) to sponsor a four-person panel featuring Palin. 

 

 Jeezus Christ, that's a lot of money. For that type of cash, what will Bristol be discussing?

The panel will address the issue of abstinence in a college setting.

 

 

Abstinence in a college setting? Someone who has never attended college and sucks at abstinence is going to be the keynote freakin' speaker at a discussion of abstinence in college? Why not ask her to discuss the difficulties of playing in the NFL, or what it's like to be raised by decent parents?

Why not pay her $20,000 to talk about how to pick the right guy? Or pay her to explain why she named her baby "Tripp" when a: Tripp is not a name and b: the nickname "Tripp" generally is given to someone with a "The third" after his name.

What is she going to say to the audience? "Don't have sex because you might get knocked up like me and then you'd be forced to travel around to various shitty colleges talking about it for $20,000 a pop." 'Cuz I think that's pretty much the extent of her insight into the matter. 

The event will begin with a 25-minute speech by Palin on her life story to be followed by an hour-long panel discussion and a half hour question-and-answer session. A reception will be held after the question and answer to allow students to interact with Palin one-on-one.

 

Of course, the last time someone interacted one-on-one with Bristol, she got pregnant.

And how in the hell can it take 25 minutes to tell her life story? She's what, 20 years old? "First I was a baby, then a little girl, then I got knocked up and went on Dancing With the Stars and Levi's a total butthead!"

Some Treasury members felt that Palin’s speech would spark student interest.
“I know it will fill Graham Chapel, so to me, that’s value in itself,” said Treasury representative Daniel Bernard, a junior. “It brings the student body together in a way that we usually don’t have on this campus.”

I think bringing the student body together is exactly what Bristol is there to warn against!

“One concern I do have when we fund someone like Bristol Palin is, what really are we supporting? And to me it’s someone who is famous because they got pregnant at 18,” said freshman Jacob Trunsky, chair of the Budget Committee.

Now that's just not fair. She was sixteen.

“I understand that people are not going to be happy—this will probably be protested. We really just want to start dialogue and the fact that we’re bringing in a balanced panel should be taken into account,” Elman said. “We’re not just bringing in Bristol Palin, we’re bringing her in with three or four other educated people.”

Oh. Three or four educated people? (Technically not "other educated people") Who else is on the panel?Who are these others who will be providing balance?

The originally scheduled panel included representatives from the Catholic Student Center, Missouri Right to Life, and Planned Parenthood. 

Now that's balance! One speaker from Planned Parenthood, two from the "don't have sex 'cause you might get pregnant" school and one from the "don't have sex 'cause you'll go to hell" academy.

Wow, this whole sex-week abstinence panel just sounds awesome! I just can't wait until. . .

Bristol Palin will not speak at Washington University; SHAC says decision mutual

 

  

Oh, I'm sure the decision was mutual. Just like when my sophomore-year girlfriend broke up with me at the Spring dance, it was mutual. I'm sure that the person who now won't be getting 20 grand for nothing was really okay with this. Heck, it was probably her idea.

The Stupid, Dishonest Apple Doesn't Fall Far From the Stupid, Dishonest Tree.

– Fri Sep 24, 4:07 pm ET
ANCHORAGE, Alaska – Following in her mother's footsteps, Bristol Palin has launched an official Facebook page. Among her first subjects: her role on "Dancing with the Stars."

The 19-year-old daughter of former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin says the Tuesday launch is part of a new chapter in her life.

The single mother of a toddler son, Bristol Palin says she wanted to step out of her comfort zone to tell her story and advocate for the "pro-life and pro-family cause."

Why can't anyone in this family just tell the truth?
Why can't she just say "I went on the show because they offered me money, and I'm genetically programmed to be a shameless fame-whore." We could respect that. I'm sure a lot of people would be willing to dance badly on TV for a truckload of money.

But no, she has to pretend that what she's doing, she does for a greater cause. Dancing on TV and prattling on Facebook are a couple of sacrifices she's willing to make for the pro-life cause. Because what better way to advocate for your position than to make an ass of yourself on an idiotic TV show?



I'm sure if Gandhi were alive today, he would sign up for "India's Got Talent" to get his message across to the world.

If only "Big Brother" had been around in the '60's, Dr. King could have saved himself a lot of trouble and just whispered about civil rights in the dark while drunkenly fondling a cast-mate.

And surely Mario Savio could have sung "put your bodies upon the gears" to the tune of "Genie in a Bottle" on American Idol.

Bristol Palin's New Career

From Bloomberg News:

Bristol Palin sets up PR firm

Because who's more qualified to run a company than a 19-year old single mother with no work experience, no formal education, and no apparent skills?

So the company will be known as BSMP LLC, because you gotta have a catchy name in the PR game!

The single-member limited liability corporation will be known as BSMP LLC
and based in Anchorage.

So the company is one person.
And it's based in ANCHORAGE ALASKA?
Anchorage, Alaska -- because you know, fuck you Los Angeles!

I think it's safe to say that Bristol doesn't have a real firm grip of what Public Relations is really all about.