What the hell is Limbaugh talking about?

I'll make this quick since my computer is being very uncooperative today.


I saw this a few days ago, and I'm still not sure what the hell he was trying to say. I mean, I've been turning it over in my head trying to find a way that this makes any sense. Even factoring in that Limbaugh has zero human decency, I still can't figure what his point is supposed to be.

“You know what the magic word, the only thing that matters in American sexual mores today is? One thing. You can do anything, the left will promote and understand and tolerate anything, as long as there is one element. Do you know what it is? Consent. If there is consent on both or all three or all four, however many are involved in the sex act, it’s perfectly fine. Whatever it is. But if the left ever senses and smells that there’s no consent in part of the equation then here come the rape police. But consent is the magic key to the left.”

What????


Okay, I only see two possible ways he could have meant this. First, and most horrific, is that in his fevered brain, the idea of consent, that you shouldn't fuck anyone who doesn't want you to fuck them, is some sort of hippy-dippy lefty-loosey notion that is just really out there. Which doesn't really make sense because, yeah, that's exactly how it works and everyone knows that. Consent is what differentiates between a fun evening and a horrible crime. It's the same difference between a withdrawal and a bank robbery. It's the difference between a road trip and a kidnapping, between a boxing match and assault & battery. It's not a liberal/lefty/progressive thing, it's just the definition of the word.


The other possibility I can see is less horrifying, but still awful in its own way. He may be saying that sex, at least non-marital sex, is always wrong whether it is consensual or not and that the left seems to think it's okay as long as all parties are willing participants. If sao, that's pretty rich coming from this thrice-married pill-popper who may or may not frequent the fleshpots of the third world armed with a forged prescription for Viagara. ( http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/crime/rush-limbaughs-dominican-stag-party )



And I really don't know what to make of the line:  But if the left ever senses and smells that there’s no consent in part of the equation then here come the rape police.

Ah, yes. The "rape police." Or, as they're more commonly referred to, the "POLICE."

Usually if you toss another word in front of the word "police," it's because you're making a joke about someone who is not actually a police. Like the "grammar police" or the "fashion police." But the rape police are the actual police. I mean, he must know that, right?

I don't know. And I don't know why I care. I just have this compulsion to try to make sense out of things. But this? This has me stumped.

I believe I'll go to Florida and get some sand in my shoes.

Yes, once again it is time for the Missus and your humble correspondent to make our sorta annual trek to the Redneck Riviera, aka the Florida Panhandle. So there probably won't be much if any posting for about a week.

But before we go, one quick thing.

I saw this on No More Mr. Nice Blog, who saw it on Newsmax.

Rush Limbaugh: Sharia Law Already Happening in US

In light of the fallout from the recent shooting in Texas, conservative talk show host Rush Limbaugh says Sharia law is already happening. Limbaugh said on his radio show Thursday that on "one of the networks this morning somebody was defending Pam Geller and started saying, 'If we're not careful, Sharia law is gonna happen,'" and the co-host responded, saying that "'There isn't gonna be Sharia law in the United States of America. Just isn't gonna happen. Come on, get real, get real, it's silly.'" But Limbaugh said that "Sharia law has already been implemented in this country." "Are you aware that in New Jersey a judge found that an Islamic man could not be accused of the rape of his wife?" the conservative radio host asked his audience. "A judge in New Jersey found that he could not be charged with it, much less found guilty, because there's no rape in his religion," he explained. "Well, hello. That's Sharia. "Now, it's not Sharia that has become American law, but it's been implemented," he added. "It's been used."

  Professor Chaos said...

Oh, no wonder all the Christian churches have been shut down! And my wife has been busy burqa shopping! It all makes sense now! Because for the first time in American history, a male judge has found an excuse to let a rapist off the hook!

And, as Steve M. pointed out, that ruling was almost immediately overturned. But at this point in the article, I'm thinking "well, thank Allah that this was New Jersey , not Indiana, because under their "religious freedom" law, that decision might have been upheld, if the man in question had a sincerely-held religious belief that he should be allowed to force his wife into sex whenever he wanted. And, sure, that law is only supposed to apply to homophobic Christian wedding cake bakers, but once you establish that your religious beliefs can exempt you from having to follow the law, why wouldn't that principle apply in a case like this?

Anyway, the ruling was overturned, sanity was restored and Sharia Law went back to being something that Americans neend't concern themselves with, and we all lived happily ever after with no Sharia law at all.

But Limbaugh wasn't finished. He apparently also saw the parallel with the Indiana Religious Freedom law. Except he saw it in a completely stupid and insane way.

I would even go so far as to point out that what happened in Indiana when they had their religious freedom law pass there, remember the outrage that occurred as a result of that? The media is running around going door-to-door looking for a bigot. They found this young woman and her family that owned a pizzeria. The people at the pizzeria had never said anything about whether or not they would cater a gay wedding. It had never come up. But the media goes door-to-door, starts asking, and in response a question, this young woman who thinks that the media is really interested in what she's saying, doesn't realize she's being set up, says, "No, we would not cater a gay wedding. It's against our religious principle." And, bammo, the sewer that is Twitter blew up. Everybody in the country came descending on the state of Indiana. That's an example of what Sharia would be like.

Right, right, except no. Everything about that is wrong. The pizza lady was not "set up,' she wanted to become a famous martyr with a GoFundMe account and that's exactly what she did, raising around 3/4 of a million dollars to support her bigotry. The pizza family (and Gawd, could you imagine what pizza made by Indiana white trash must taste like? **shudder**) voluntarily shut down their business because begging for handouts from their fellow bigots is way more lucrative.

And I really think that you have zero idea of what Sharia law is if you think that its practitioners would come flocking to Indiana to shame homophobes. In a Sharia law country, the question "would you cater a gay wedding" would never be asked. Because there would be no such thing as a gay wedding. There would officially not be any such thing as a gay person, all the suspected gay persons having already been put to death. And certainly no one who practices Sharia law would ever ever defend the rights of gay persons to marry. You moron.

So that's it for this week. Heading off to the beach. Back in a week, more or less.

Oh, and since it's Friday, here's a quick Friday Flashback with Rockpile:

Fuck You, Vanity Fair

This is the photo they use to illustrate their story about women in television:







Although, to be fair, a lot of the blame has to go to the actresses willing to pose for this.

It seems especially awful in light of this:

(via Daily Mail online)

Lee Aronsohn, the co-creator of the CBS comedy Two and a Half Men is in hot water for saying female-oriented comedies have reached the point of saturation.
Speaking with the Hollywood Reporter at the Toronto Screenwriting Conference, he said: ‘Enough, ladies, I get it. You have periods.’
He complained of the latest batch of comedy shows targeted toward women, including 2 Broke Girls and Whitney.
He added: ‘But we’re approaching peak vagina on television, the point of labia saturation.’
But Aronsohn, 59, who is married and has three children, didn’t stop there.
He said that the show focuses on ‘damaged men. What makes men damaged? Sorry, it’s women. I never got my heart broken by a man.’

 Those remarks seem especially indefensible, so of course they were defended by giant sack of shit Rush Limbaugh, who had this nugget to add to the national discourse:

All he’s talking about here is the chickification of his business. He writes sitcoms – he’s a comedy writer. He says the women have taken over. It’s all vagina all the time. We get it! Ok women, let us alone.

 So, yeah, it seems like a perfect time to portray the women currently making strides in the television industry as pornified eye-candy. Way to go, Vanity Fair! Asses!

Did You Hear That?

Did you hear that sound? That's the sound of my last little ounce of respect for Elton John disappearing into the void.

Elton John performs at Rush Limbaugh's wedding for $1M

I didn't think he could sink any lower than when he dueted with notorious homophobe Eminem at some awards show a few years back.

Before that, I didn't think he could sink any lower than recording "That's What Friends Are For."

But this is just pathetic. Rush Limbaugh? Seriously, Rush Limbaugh? How can you possibly need the money that badly? I don't have anything close to your millions, and I'd starve before I took any of that cretin's money. Elton John, you are dead to me.

Limbaugh sinks to a New Low

So someone called in to the Oxycontin Follies show yesterday asking about Eric Massa's replacement in Congress.

Since Massa resigned mid-term (also known as "pulling a Palin") his replacement will be appointed by sorta black governor David "I fucked everybody" Patterson.

Here's what the bloated sack of contemptuousness had to say on the subject:

"Let's assume you're right," Limbaugh responded. "So, David Paterson will become the massa...who gets to appoint whoever gets to take Massa's place. So, for the first time in his life, Paterson's gonna be a massa. Interesting, interesting."

A "massa" Joke? Seriously, a joke about slavery?
This:
is funny to you?


It will be interesting to see how the dittoheads twist this into their "Rush is not a racist" narrative.

To avoid any confusion, let me state for the record. Rush Limbaugh is a RACIST.
And an idiot.
And impotent (The Smoking Gun)




Oh, and I stumbled on to this a minute ago. Not germane to the subject at hand, but pretty much sums up the axis of arrogance and ignorance that is Limbaugh:

Who Can Be A Bigger Dick?

Pat Robertson set the bar pretty, pretty low with his "deal with the devil" bloviation. Let's see who will challenge Pat for the title of biggest dick (Haiti edition).

First Up: Debbie Schlussel.

It’s good that Barack Obama finally commented on the suffering of the people of Haiti and dispatched American help. Yes, morally we should help them because it’s the right thing to do. But strategically, we must help them because if we don’t, we’ll soon find Obama welcoming thousands more Haitian refugees to our shores and entitlement roles.

Wow! Debbie took a look at the news footage of the tragedy in Haiti and immediately thought: "Oh, God! They're gonna start coming here!" That's your concern? That more of "those people" will come to America? And that is the main reason for providing help to the victims? Pretty dickish, Deb!

Who's next?

Rush Limbaugh:

Yes, I think in the Haiti earthquake, ladies and gentlemen -- in the words of Rahm Emanuel, we have another crisis simply too good to waste. This will play right into Obama's hands -- humanitarian, compassionate. They'll use this to burnish their -- shall we say -- credibility with the black community, in the both light-skinned and dark-skinned black community, in this country. It's made-to-order for 'em. That's why he couldn't wait to get out there. Could not wait to get out there.

That place, Haiti, has been run by dictators and communists. And how long is it gonna be, how long is it gonna be before we hear Obama and the left in this country say that what we really need to do is reinstate the communist Aristide to the leadership position down there to coordinate putting the country back together?

Damn! Rush saw the calamity unfolding and thought "Hey! I can use this to score some points against Obama!" What a dick!


Who else? Anyone from that bastion of dickishness, the Heritage Foundation?
Why, here's Heritage member Jim Roberts now:

The U.S. government response should be bold and decisive. . . President Obama should also reach out to a senior Republican figure, perhaps former President George W. Bush, to lead the bipartisan effort for the Republicans.

While on the ground in Haiti, the U.S. military can also interrupt the nightly flights of cocaine to Haiti and the Dominican Republic from the Venezuelan coast and counter the ongoing efforts of Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez to destabilize the island of Hispaniola.

The U.S. should implement a strong and vigorous public diplomacy effort to counter the negative propaganda certain to emanate from the Castro-Chavez camp. Such an effort will also demonstrate that the U.S.’s involvement in the Caribbean remains a powerful force for good in the Americas and around the globe.

Oh, my God! So this tool saw the disaster and thought a) "This could help George W. Bush rehabilitate his image!" and b) "This could be a great opportunity to advance noeconservative foreign policy objectives!" Wow, the daily double of being a dick!

I think we have a winner, I'm just not sure who.

Rush Limbaugh has No Integrity

Let's say you had a radio show.

And let's say you read something that was posted on a humor/satire website.

And let's just say that you were dumb enough to believe it and too lazy and perfidious to do any basic fact-checking.

Then let's say that after you reported the joke as fact, you were informed that the joke was, in fact, a joke.

There are a couple of legitimate responses from which you could choose.

You might say something like: "Sorry, folks, it looks like I've been had. That story was made up as a joke. I'll try to be more careful in the future."

Or you could get angry at the person who posted the joke and try to blame him for your mistake.

But what if you were Rush Limbaugh? (uggggh, shudder!)
If you're Rush Limbaugh, you go with the "it's false, but I stand by it" defense.

"So, I can say, "I don't care if these quotes are made up," he said. "I know Obama thinks it.

"You know why I know Obama thinks it? Because I've heard him say it."

Oh, Rush! You're irrepressible!


Hey, remember when Dan Rather quoted a document which may have been fake (still hasn't been proven) in support of a story whose basic facts were 100% true?

And remember how the right howled for his head? And they got it?!!

Shouldn't they be holding Rush to a similar standard?

Isn't reporting on an obvious fake as if it were fact in service of a story which is total bullshit (and really, the fake article IS the story) like 10 times worse than Rather's mistake? What are the odds that the righties will be calling for Limbaugh to be fired now?

And, yes I know, they'll say that Limbaugh isn't a journalist, he's an entertainer or an editorialist, or whatever, but when he reported this phony story on the air, he was absolutely acting as a reporter. Shouldn't he have to have some standard of integrity?

It's beyond me how anyone thinks this assclown has any credibility.

Rush has Lost It.

Okay, I'm going to go ahead and call it, as of Thursday, 10/22/09, Rush Limbaugh has officially lost it.

Limbaugh said, “Obama is out there saying that Fox News is talk radio. I am living rent free in this guy’s head. Fox News is talk radio. If that’s true, MSNBC is pornography, and Obama likes MSNBC. CNN is child porn, my God folks…”

If MSNBC is porn, that's got to be the worst porn ever. Look at this cast:



EEEEWWWWW


















UGH!













YECH!!!!


















OH, Ye GAWDS!!!!!
















As for calling CNN "child porn?" I don't even get it. I think Rush has just gone completely 'round the bend.

I remember when I first stumbled on to Rush Limbaugh on the radio back in 1988 or 89. He was an ass even then, but he was kinda funny. He was entertaining in his way, and he made sense. I disagreed with him on pretty much everything, but at least I could understand what point he was making. Now he's like a mental patient. What the hell is he even saying about MSNBC and CNN? What in the world would you find pornographic about either network?

I think he's just given up any pretense of trying to make sense and now just shouts vile accusations at whomever it is he doesn't like. I expect that in his personal life, he must be constantly making these sorts of claims

"My ex-wife is a reptilian Satan-worshipper!"

"That rude waiter was a Nazi collaborator!"

"The guy who cut me off in traffic is a puppy-raping child murderer!"

"My other ex-wife is a baby-fisting lycanthrope!"


And so on.

Rush, it's over. You need help. Please, check yourself into a psycho ward before you hurt yourself or someone else.

This Shit is Getting Way Out of Hand

The Teabaggers are pretty much openly threatening violence.













These people are not joking. They really believe all the paranoid conspiracy bullshit, and people like Beck, Limbaugh, Palin, etc. keep egging them on.

One of these lunatics is going to be the next Timothy Mcveigh, and people are going to get killed, and the Becks and Limbaughs of the world are going to be shocked, shocked! that such a thing would happen. But they will have blood on their hands, too.

My God, You're Witty, Rush!

The legendary Limbaugh wit was on display again earlier this week. I would have mentioned it sooner, but every time I think about it, I start laughing too hard to type.

Remember when Barney Frank asked Crazy McLooneypants what planet she lived on? Well, Rush and his razor-sharp wit did him one better!

He said on his radio show (and you should probably just go ahead and start holding your sides now) he said "But the killer for me was, here's Barney Frank [asking] "what planet do you live on" to this woman. Isn't it an established fact that Barney Frank himself lives around Uranus?"

Ha! Uranus!
See, what he did there was he crafted this bon mot around the fact that the planet Uranus sounds a lot like "your anus!" See, and Barney Frank, well Barney is gay, see! And a lot of gay men actually do engage in anal sex. Which involves the anus! So he turned the whole planet theme around on him while simultaneously making a gay joke!

Listening to Rush Limbaugh's radio show must be like attending a dinner party with Oscar Wilde, Mark Twain, Will Rogers, Winston Churchill and Groucho Marx! And a guy who makes ass jokes.

Well, Rush, you've thrown down the gauntlet, I will accept the challenge and try to construct some clever repartee that can stand up against your own rapier wit.

Let's see, um. . . "It's ironic that Rush Limbaugh would make jokes about planets, since his head is permanently lodged in Uranus!"

No, that's no good. How about "It's strange that Rush Limbaugh would joke about Barney Frank since Rush is such a lying sack of dog shit."

"It's odd that Rush Limbaugh would joke about the town hall meetings. You'd think he's be too busy sending his maid to score Oxy-Contin."

Or "Funny that Rush Limbaugh would have a radio show when he is so clearly a flaming bag of poo on the doorstep of intelligent discourse."

No, Rush, I could never match your gift for the plaisanterie amusante. I must concede. What a clever, clever man you must be!

The Stupidest Boycott Ever.

The American Auto industry is in big trouble. Chrysler and GM are teetering on the brink of bankruptcy. Dealerships are closing, workers are being laid off. But someone has figured out a way to make things worse!
A boycott of General Motors!

Yes, really!

It seems to have started with some columnist named Hugh Hewitt





















(seen here painted for Halloween)

Hewitt had this to say about GM:

I won't buy a socialist car, which means I won't be buying a GM or Chrysler car for as long as the U.S. government owns huge blocks of the companies.

Even if massive subsidies for a time present appealing products at subsidized prices, however, I won't be visiting a GM or Chrysler lot no matter the product offered.

So, no matter how good the car, and no matter how good the price, you will pass up the deal because it offends your ridiculous ideology? Is that what we're getting at here? If Gm ends up making the best car on the market (maybe bringing back the Bel Air? A boy can dream!) you will buy an inferior car and pay more for it because the government bailed out GM. Wow, talk about cutting off your nose to spite your face!

Buy Ford. Buy Toyota. Buy anything that isn't owned and operated by the federal government.

That's right. It's better to support one of our foreign competitors than to buy from a company which has offended Hugh Jass, I mean Hewitt.

And of course, the flaming bag of poo on the doorstep of intelligent discourse, Rush Limbaugh is jumping on the moron bandwagon.

Limbaugh reassures any GM workers who might be listening that the boycotters aren’t angry at them. “They don’t want to patronize Obama. They don’t want to do anything to make Obama’s policies work!” he explains. “This is an untold story, by the way. Of course, the government-controlled media is not gonna report anything like this but there are a lot of people who are not going to buy from Chrysler or General Motors as long as it is perceived Barack Obama is running it, because people do not want his policy to work here because this is antithetical to the American economic way of life.”

So, sure, thousands of decent hard-working Americans might lose their livelihoods, but it will be worth it to be able to point at Barack Obama and say ( in a sing-song cadence) "haha ha ha haha! Your policies didn't work! Because we sabotaged them and brought down a major American company in the process!"
Oh, and not to quibble, but there is no "government-controlled media" in this country. I think you're confusing the US with North Korea again. Are you finally giving up on the "liberal media" myth and moving on to a new paranoid fantasy?

Oh, and also, fuck you.


ADDENDUM:

Apparently, Hugh "Jass" Hewitt (Yes, I know i stole that from the Simpsons) is quite the little boycotter, although he's pretty modest about it:

I don't resort to boycotts often. In seven years on the radio, I have urged exactly one: Against Target, for throwing the Salvation Army from its doorways. I still maintain my refusal to enter Target, and hope you do as well.

I think maybe Hugh has a different definition of the word "often" than the rest of us. Let's see, he has urged boycotts of:

TARGET (see above)

CANADA:

Looks like Boycott #2 is on the horizon. If Canada can't defend the free speech of its most talented native son, then it shouldn't be getting even our devalued tourist dollars.

VERMONT:

It is time to cancel that trip to Vermont. Be sure to tell the Vermont Chamber of Commerce why you aren't coming and drop a note to the Burlington Free Press to let the state's leading paper know as well. The Vermont tourism industry can thank Pat Leahy, the father of the mother of all Senate boycotts.

And

PEPSI:
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1406817/posts

Mary Grabar

I had never heard of Mary Grabar until today. I was happier not having heard of her. But today, in an apparent attempt to accelerate its plunge from respectability, The Atlanta Journal Constitution gave a guest column to Ms. Grabar. And here is the title of her foray into op/ed nuttery:

We Need Insights, Wit From Limbaugh

So, naturally I thought she must be calling on Rush to provide insight and wit instead of the blather, lies and smears that he normally supplies. But no! What Ms. Grabar 's column claims is that "I've enjoyed the insights and wit from Limbaugh."



She goes on: "I am always impressed by his ability to apply historical figures, ideas, events, and constitutional principles."

I'm sorry, who are we talking about here? Is there some other Limbaugh I don't know about, because this can't be Rush. Can you give me an example of this ability?

"Rush Limbaugh provided historical explanation for the public’s adoration of Obama: the same kind of emotional investment that caused gulag prisoners to cry at Stalin’s death."

That's not "historical explanation" that's idiocy. Rush sees some sort of parallel between the American electorate's affection for the charismatic Obama and the Stockholm syndrome of brainwashed Soviet prisoners. What the fuck? There is no parallel, no comparison. It's not apples and oranges, it's apples and circular saws. This is what you consider insight? Look, I can draw a completely absurd historical parallel, too. Um, let's see. The AJC"s decision to publish the fatuous claptrap of Mary Grabar is akin to William Nygaards's decision to publish "The Satanic Verses" in Norway.

See, it means nothing, but it does sound pretty ominous.

So what does Ms Grabar do for a living when she's not writing sheer nonsense? Apparently, she teaches at some college here in Georgia. Also, she writes several blogs, including one named. I kid you not, "The Other White People."

This is a blogsite run by Mary Grabar, who does not apologize for being white, who believes that "hope" and "change" come not from some academic, politician, or celebrity, but from within with the help of God, and that Western civilization is the best civilization.

Youch! Crazy alert!

So, as to her career as a professor, Ms Grabar writes:

This is what I miss about my profession as a college instructor. Rarely am I able to discuss ideas with my colleagues; indeed, I dare not speak my opinion nor say anything positive about any figures on the left’s “hit list.”

OK, do you know what a "hit list" is? It is not a list of people you admire or respect, it is a list of targets for a professional assassin. But that's really beside the point. I imagine that you rarely get to discuss ideas with your colleagues because they avoid you the way I avoid the Homeless guy practcing his karate moves on parking meters and newspaper machines. I know that there's no point, he's not going to have anything to add to a discussion of ideas. I would guess that around your campus, the phrase, "Oh God, here comes that crazy Mary Grabar" is a pretty common utterance.

One of those figures is Alexis de Tocqueville, the French aristocrat who toured the United States in the 1830s and provided an invaluable analysis of the American character and government in his multivolume work, “Democracy in America.”

But to mention his name without the preface of “fascist” or “elitist” is to invite suspicions of one’s academic credentials — and employability.

Um, Mary, I've only known you since this morning, but I'm already questioning your academic credentials.

What the talk show hosts do is present foundational ideas to concerned and intellectually curious citizens. Their wild success exposes a hunger for ideas rarely met in other forums — like our schools. That is why they want to shut down talk radio as it is today.

Listen, you paranoid idiot. No one, not even the sinister "They" , is trying to shut down talk radio, just like no one is asking you to apologize for being white, or to call de Tocqueville a fascist.

I just don't have the strength to go into all the banal idiocies of Mary Grabar. If you're interested, you can read the whole column here. Let me just jump to the conclusion:

Tocqueville is talking about the middle class that keeps this country going. And today they are millions of voters and they’re educating themselves by listening to talk radio and buying books.

Gawd, I shudder to think that the American middle class is educating itself by listening to Talk Radio. Although that's probably better than attending a class taught by Ms Grabar.

Rush Limbaugh

Obviously Ol' Rush has a problem with the current President. We know his fondest hope is that Obama fails, even if that means that the whole country fails. That's to be expected from a buffoon like Ol' Rush. But now, it really looks like the gasbag king has gone off the deep end. Now he's rooting for the pirates!




No, that wouldn't be that strange.



OK, that would be a little odd, creepy even, but no, not that pirate.





I don't think she's really even a pirate.






I mean, real pirates. Murderous, kidnapping, theiving Goddam PIRATES!

These assholes:

Somali Pirates. Rushie has a lot of sympathy for Somali pirates. Don't believe me? Well, that's understandable. Any normal person would think "No way. Even Rush isn't that big a dickwad. No one was rooting for the scumbag pirates in their stand off with the US Navy. It's not possible for any human being to be such a turd that he sees the hostage-taking criminals as the good guys!" Well, that's because you're thinking like a normal person. Rush is NOT a normal person. Really. Here's what he has to say about the pirates.

They were kids. The story is out, I don’t know if it’s true or not, but apparently the hijackers, these kids, the merchant marine organizers, Muslim kids, were upset, they wanted to just give the captain back and head home because they were running out of food, they were running out of fuel, they were surrounded by all these U.S. Navy ships, big ships, and they just wanted out of there. That’s the story, but then when one of them put a gun to the back of the captain, Mr. Phillips, then bam, bam, bam. There you have it, and three teenagers shot on the high seas at the order of President Obama.

They were kids! Oh boo-hoo-hoo, they were just kids! Why? Why did these poor youths have to be shot down in the prime of their lives? Just because " one of them put a gun to the back of the captain, Mr. Phillips," Oh, boo-hoo!!!!

Seriously, when the hell did Rusharoo become such a bleeding-heart, soft-on-crime weenie?

If only President Obama had known that the three Somali community organizers were actually young black Muslim teenagers, I’m sure he wouldn’t have given the order to shoot. That’s the correct way to look at it. If only Obama had known.

Well thanks, Baron Jackovsky, but i think I'll look at this the way EVERYONE ELSE IN THE REAL WORLD looks at it, which is: The Navy Seals are fucking heroes who rescued an innocent man from the clutches of barbarous pirates.

Besides which, it's a pretty safe bet that President Obama DID know that these teens were Muslim since EVERYONE IN SOMALIA IS MUSLIM! I know it's hard to get used to a president who's not a total ignoramus, but I'm pretty sure this president was aware of this.

God Damn It, Rush would you just shut the hell up?

Rush Limbaugh

So Bloated, Bloviating Blowhard Rush Limbaugh wants President Obama to come on his show and debate him, which is a little like me challenging Kobe Bryant to a little one-on-one.*
I imagine the debate going something like this:

OBAMA: I believe, that in regard to the stimulus package. . .

RUSH: I hate women!

OBAMA: Yes, I know, but as I was saying. . .

RUSH: You're black!

OBAMA: Excuse me?

RUSH: I'm not going to bend over and grab my ankles for you, just because you're black!**

OBAMA: Good God, I should hope not! Now about the stimulus. . .

RUSH: LaLaLaLa, I can't hear you, LaLaLalLA Socialism, LaLaLaLaLaLa You're a socialist LaLa

OBAMA: Am I being punked?

RUSH: I win the debate! You owe me 1000 oxycontins!

I would rather see old Rush debate Susie Essman from "Curb Your Enthusiasm," because I think the debate might go more like this:

SUSIE: Rush, you fat fuck, shut your goddamned mouth!

RUSH: but, but but,

SUSIE: Fuck You, you drug-addicted cocksucker!

RUSH: But I. . .

SUSIE: Shut up, you lying sack of shit!

Then the ref stops the fight.

*Kobe, if you're reading this, I totally do challenge you to a game!

**Think I'm exgagerating? check this out. Or this.